Favorite George Carlin Quotes

[Gemini Cricket]

Mickey Mouse's birthday being announced on the television news as if it were an actual event! I don't give a sh!t! If I cared about Mickey Mouse's birthday I would have memorized it years ago! And I'd send him a card, 'Dear Mickey, Happy Birthday, Love George'. I don't do that, why, don't give a sh!t! F*ck Mickey Mouse! F*ck him in the ass with a big rubber dick! Then break it off and beat him with it! I hope Mickey dies. I do, I hope he goddamn dies. I hope he gets a hold of some tainted cheese, and dies lonely and forgotten in the bathroom of some bad building in a poor neighborhood, with his hand in Goofy's pants. Mickey Mouse- no wonder no one takes our country seriously, we waste valuable news time informing our citizens of the age of an imaginary rodent!