A sympathetic ear, please...

Motorboat Cruiser · 10-10-2005, 02:54 PM

I'm not sure why I am posting this. I guess just to get it out.

I'm not even sure where to start. Our roommate Doug had moved in last June. Matthew had met him on the bus and he seemed like a nice guy who was just a bit down on his luck. He didn't have a car or a place to live and was staying at a motel. He was employed though and needed a room to rent and we decided that by letting him move in, it would help both of our situations. He had a beautiful 9 yr old daughter that used to stay with us on the weekends and she was a sweet girl who adored her father almost as much as he adored her.

He was a really good guy but battled with alcohol. We saw that he was having a problem but didn't really know what to do. About a week ago, he lost his job. He only had about half of his rent money but we were trying to be understanding. He told us that his sister would be sending him a money-gram on Saturday and he would have what he owed us. On Saturday morning, he left saying he would be back in a couple of hours with the rent. That was the last we saw of him.

This morning, I don't know why but I decided to look at the Orange County Register and see if there might be any clue as to where he was. We were worried about him and something made me look. A news story immediately caught my eye. It would appear that Saturday night, our roommate laid down on the train tracks in Dana Point and was struck and killed.

Matthew and I are in such a daze today. There is the anger, the sadness, the confusion. We realize that there is nothing that we could have done. He gave no indication that he was planning this, at least none that we could have recognized at the time. We also feel an enormous amount of sadness for his little girl, who we thought the world of. I feel so horrible for her right now.

I contacted the coroner this morning (through the sherriff) to find out if her and her mom had been contacted. They apparently were on Sunday. I want to call her but don't know if it is appropriate yet. We decided that we will wait a few days and make a decision. I assume that they might have a lot of questions. I don't know that we have any answers but maybe we can help in some way.

We are ok, for the most part. We're not really sure what to feel right now. We both took the day off and are just trying to stay busy and keep our minds off of it. That's damn near impossible though. I will never understand suicide. I will never understand the mindset. I feel like I should be angry with him but I don't have the heart. I miss him and I hurt for him and his family. I just hurt. Keep us in your thoughts please.

10-10-2005, 02:54 PM	#1
Motorboat Cruiser Cruiser of Motorboats Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: So Cal Posts: 3,665	A sympathetic ear, please... I'm not sure why I am posting this. I guess just to get it out. I'm not even sure where to start. Our roommate Doug had moved in last June. Matthew had met him on the bus and he seemed like a nice guy who was just a bit down on his luck. He didn't have a car or a place to live and was staying at a motel. He was employed though and needed a room to rent and we decided that by letting him move in, it would help both of our situations. He had a beautiful 9 yr old daughter that used to stay with us on the weekends and she was a sweet girl who adored her father almost as much as he adored her. He was a really good guy but battled with alcohol. We saw that he was having a problem but didn't really know what to do. About a week ago, he lost his job. He only had about half of his rent money but we were trying to be understanding. He told us that his sister would be sending him a money-gram on Saturday and he would have what he owed us. On Saturday morning, he left saying he would be back in a couple of hours with the rent. That was the last we saw of him. This morning, I don't know why but I decided to look at the Orange County Register and see if there might be any clue as to where he was. We were worried about him and something made me look. A news story immediately caught my eye. It would appear that Saturday night, our roommate laid down on the train tracks in Dana Point and was struck and killed. Matthew and I are in such a daze today. There is the anger, the sadness, the confusion. We realize that there is nothing that we could have done. He gave no indication that he was planning this, at least none that we could have recognized at the time. We also feel an enormous amount of sadness for his little girl, who we thought the world of. I feel so horrible for her right now. I contacted the coroner this morning (through the sherriff) to find out if her and her mom had been contacted. They apparently were on Sunday. I want to call her but don't know if it is appropriate yet. We decided that we will wait a few days and make a decision. I assume that they might have a lot of questions. I don't know that we have any answers but maybe we can help in some way. We are ok, for the most part. We're not really sure what to feel right now. We both took the day off and are just trying to stay busy and keep our minds off of it. That's damn near impossible though. I will never understand suicide. I will never understand the mindset. I feel like I should be angry with him but I don't have the heart. I miss him and I hurt for him and his family. I just hurt. Keep us in your thoughts please.
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