Body Image...

[Not Afraid]

I realized there are people on this board who have known me a various weights. When Chris met me, I was 123 lbs and skinny skinny (and gross!). That was my absolute thinnest and I'd NEVER want to go back there (and I was still not "model material"). I've mostly fluctuated between 140 and 190 but even at 150 I'm not "thin".

I find that if "thin" is a goal, I'm never going to make it (and I'm not sure I really should want to). The only advantage I have when I'm thin is that clothes fit better because I'm a coat hanger. But, do I really want to BE thin? In actuality, probably not. I like curves and softness. It's much more attractive and certainly feels better to the body cuddling with yours. But, even knowing that, I still secretly hope for "thin" again one day. That's pretty dangerous thinking.