Cut your hair, you wizard hippies!

[LSPoorEeyorick]

I remember when word came out that Revenge of the Sith was going to feature shaggy haircuts that would better segue into the retro hair of A New Hope. (I also remember discussing with somebody that it was a silly idea; that if there were twenty years between the fifties crew-cuts and the seventies shag, no shag would be necessary for people living twenty years before a long long time ago in a galaxy far away.)

Now I see the hippie cut on the Potter children. (Even Neville, in an image on CBBC Newsround. WHY NEVILLE?!)

I can only make the following conclusion:

Every year there is a super-secret fashion symposia where the influential people of the world unite and decide upon the next year's trends so that when videos and films and fashion lines finally come out, everybody matches.

Maybe it's a secret society or a cult. Perhaps there are slots that must be filled per type, as such:

1 self-aggrandizing director (here's where Lucas comes in)
2 fashion-minded pop stars (A Madonna, perhaps, a Stefani)
1 overly-cute actress (give me your poor, your tired, your Sarah Jessica Parker)
1 dandy. From any realm of celebrity.
2 bubblegum pop clones (exhanged per year. 1999 featured Spears/Aguilera, while 2004 welcomed Lohan/Duff.)
5 heads of major studios (because, well, the clothes in the five romantic comedies starring Ashton Kutcher should really complement each other.)
1 airheaded heiress
3 editors of fashion magazines (please, won't someone think of the fat girls? Excluding them, I mean...)
1 representative from each fashion design firm
and Mr. Blackwell (never to be replaced, as is secretly among the legion of the undead)

Notes that came out of their super-secret meeting last year:
We love overlarge sunglasses! The bigger, the better.
Kabbalah is sexy. Digitally remove our bracelets if you must.
Why did we ever do away with tweed? We demand tweed.
Shirts must be designed so that when starlets stand in the slightest breeze, their nipples are revealed.
Otherwise shirts to be cinched at waist, since they only look good on seven people in the country.
Every man's hair to exceed 2.5 inches.


This can be the only explanation.