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Old 09-07-2012, 07:28 AM   #23
3894
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Cheeselandia
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cadaverous Pallor View Post
Ok, my lovely friends, now that I'm feeling more grounded, I have to ask...

I do kind of want to post this on facebook though I think I will edit quite a bit. Take out a lot of the crying at least. I'd like some constructive criticism. It seems rambling and jumbled to me, but has a strong point, and I'd like to refine it. Even if I decide not to post it, I like it as a piece on its own.
Good work, brave Mom! Congrats on the birth of your niece.

Play around with the idea that you could have three separate FB posts. Paragraphs 1 -4 are one post. Paragraph 8 and 9 are another. 5, 6, 7, and 10 are another. What do you think?
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