brat

[Cadaverous Pallor]

When I was young
and I mean young like 4 years old young
my mom would point out the other kids at the supermarket
the ones that would scream for treats or annoy their parents without pause
pulling on clothes and pointing and repeating
stomping and crying and getting what they wanted
and my mom would shake her head
and tell me I was good
and I felt strong and wise in comparison to those
snotty nosed tormentors

"I am not a brat."

Looking back, it's easy to see
that brats come in many configurations
and that I was most defnitely a brat
just a different one

I never cleaned my room nor made my bed
my parents didn't expect it
getting me to do chores was like pulling teeth
there was plenty of yelling and throwing of things
much of our time was spent in arguments
some of my most vivid memories include fury
on both sides

Yet I was always polite in public
never swore in front of grandma
never demanded large gifts
was always aware of money problems
made do with hand-me-downs
I felt strong and wise in comparison to those
in double laced LA Gear and expensive perms

"I am not a brat."

I'm reminded of my brattiness every day of my life.
Whenever I decide to not take out the trash
or put off vacuuming
or read a message board instead of working

I'm reminded when I complain about my jobs
whining about my hours
when the truth is that I'm a lucky one
with a rewarding way to spend my day
and an average amount of free time

yet I still take more breaks than I deserve
give less than my best
make sure I do no more than the next guy
pay less and less attention as years go by

it's hard for me to think it
I'm still that proud child, acknowledging an advantage
still wish I were strong and wise in comparison to those
other schlubs that drag through their dreary days
but my light burden feels heavy
my simple errands go undone
and I sigh and drag my feet and bitch
as if I have any right

I am a brat, always have been, and now I know it.

[SacTown Chronic]

Originally Posted by Cadaverous Pallor

but my light burden feels heavy

You're not a brat. You're American.

[Tref]

Brat is good.

[Claire]

Originally Posted by Cadaverous Pallor

I am a brat, always have been, and now I know it.

I love this! I was raised the same way! Polite in public, bratty to my mom in private....but never in front of my dad. Rotten!

I'm still a brat.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Originally Posted by SacTown Chronic

You're not a brat. You're American.

I could write a poem or twenty about that side of it, too.

[MouseWife]

Ahem, me too. The brat thing.

[Betty]

I really enjoyed that one.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Originally Posted by MouseWife

Ahem, me too. The brat thing.

It's good to know I'm not the only one.

This is one of those embarrassing things that I'm forcing myself to face. People don't want to admit to any weaknesses. This is a MAJOR one in my book that I've always boasted I was above.

I'd love to hear more from others on the feeling lazy, spoiled, or whiny. I actually went looking for some sort of book on how to kick a whiny habit, but I couldn't find one.

I'm sick of being a complainer, but it's so hard to shut up.

[MouseWife]

Originally Posted by Cadaverous Pallor

It's good to know I'm not the only one.

I'm sick of being a complainer, but it's so hard to shut up.

Gosh, yes, to actually admit it was a hard thing. Especially when you have spent your whole life calling other people brats!

Like that saying about what is a brat? Someone else's kids.

I have it pretty easy. People get when they call me and I tell them, 'I can't talk now, I am off to take a nap.'

I told the Hubster when my youngest finishes highschool I am going to retire.

He brings ME coffee in bed.

On roadtrips, I never drive.

I can't really think of other things at this moment. Probably blocking them out but I know, through out my day, many times I tell myself, Geesh, you are a lucky woman.

Okay. I think I just got what cured me of whining & complaining.

I do not complain how things are done because that means that I should do it myself. So, if I just enjoy how others are doing things, I don't have to do it myself.

My husband cooks. He'll ask me what I want for dinner and I say 'Whatever you want, you are the one cooking.' I don't tell him how to prepare it or anything.

When he drives, I don't critique him. I enjoy the ride.

I don't complain about the car because the solution would be for ME to get a job. Ah, I have one but the check never comes. Ditto for my shopping. I really don't need anything so much that I need to get a job for.

My friends point out things to me but, ah, I just laugh them off.

Kids take up a lot of time and they can cure you of whining. They deprive you of sleep and you can't think straight.

Let alone remember what to whine about. But, it comes back to you when they get a bit older. I am learning this.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

I've gotten to the point where I almost literally bite my tongue. I'm about to say "I'm tired" or something and I stop myself as the words enter my mouth. I think forcefully, "I'm not going to whine about this, saying 'I'm tired' won't help anything, just keep walking and don't complain," etc. It really is tough. I keep feeling like my feelings need to be heard by others, even if they don't change the situation any.

I'm just hoping that someday I won't have to coach myself through it.