Get It Off Your (Dead Man's) Chest: Pirates Movie Reviews

[Not Afraid]

I haven't read the other posts yet, but I can only imagine that there is no joy in LoTville today.

Contrived. That's my word for it.

Although there were moments of swashbuckling fun (action sequences mostly involving round things) the overall film seems so contrived. There was no mystery, not an ounce of suspense, and the gags got disracting.

I am stil not a fan of CGI effects, and the Cracken didn't help matters. I find they completely take away from the story that is unfolding. However, the story didn't really unfold in an interesting way, so I guess I shouldn't have bothered me.

Orlando Bloom was so wooden throughout the performance. When he did emote, it was as if a characature of himself was appearing - Look at my grimace while my father is whipping me! Johnny was entertaining as usual. I do love this character. Kiera did some fine acting, I thought. She at least tried to be real against wood-boy and Mr. Show.

In the Blue Bayou scene, I kept looking to see if I could see the strings on the fireflies.

The film ended and we stayed through credits. I said outloud - what happened to the dog? Chris called it. What a joke of an ending.

I thought that this film would enlighten me a bit about what they did to the attraction. It did nothing of the sort and it just made me even sadder about what they did to our beloved Pirates.

Such potential. Such unrealized potential.