Dear:

[tracilicious]

Dear Rock Music and Culture class,

You sounded cool, but you are actually three hours long. Which is nearly unbearable. I don't want to go, but I also don't want to fail. I haven't read the assigned chapter either. I feel as if I'm in high school again. I wish it was dance class night.

boredly,
Me

[tracilicious]

Dear legs,

I know that I put you through a grueling two hour karate class on Tuesday, and a pretty intense dance class on Wednesday, but really...could you be less stiff please? I like being sore, it let's me know I still have muscles, but this is unreasonable. I'm walking funny. That's not cool.

Thanks,
your brain

[Prudence]

Dear self-important director who won't speak to me directly because I'm too lowly to be acknowledged:

You are a public employee. Your salary is a matter of public record. People all over the world can look up your salary. I've indulged you by sending you your monthly budget reports in an envelope upon which I hand-write "confidential". I will not, however, purchase a special "confidential" stamp solely for the purpose of sending you your public records. If morale in your office is so low that the only thing preventing your employees from rising against you in violent revolt is ignorance of your true salary, then you have problems a "confidential" stamp can not solve.

No love,

Lowly budget flunky.

[Mousey Girl]

Dear Sweet Man on the other ned of my work phone,

You are incredibly nice, and I truly enjoyed helping you and talking to you over the last 2 days. Yes, I do understand that you were flirting with me. It really lifted my spirits. However, I am no where near the point where I can be open to any sort of romantic interest. In my present state of mind, getting involved with anyone is truly out of my realm of thinking right now. not only do I need to focus on The Boy, I also have a lot of crap to sift through. Being invovled with me would not be a good idea for you.

Signed,
very flattered

[Not Afraid]

Dear person talking on the phone while driving.

That U-turn would go quite a bit better - not to mention faster - if you used 2 hands.

Signed,

Has a bluetooth headset and doesn't have this problem.

[Morrigoon]

Dear Trader Joe,

I would like to thank you for the dinner I cooked myself tonight. You see, it featured that amazing chicken and mango sausage you had your employees cooking up at the back of your store. Though, to be honest, I think its flavors were wasted on the jambalaya she was making and, yes, even in my pasta. Short of sauteeing it with onions and peppers and enjoying it on a roll of pretzel bread, I'm not sure anything could do it justice.

So, from the bottom of my very stuffed little tum-tum, I thank you.

Sincerely,
Me

[tracilicious]

Dear Motherfvckers,

Fvck off! Asshats.

fvckily,
Traci

[GusGus]

dear tracilicious,

feel better?

me

[BarTopDancer]

Dear my Spanish teacher -

It would have been nice to tell us the homework is due the weekend of the test, instead of the day the test opens (per the syllabus). I could have gone out and had fun tonight instead of busting my butt to get it done.

Signed,

a frustrated student.

p.s. it is a lot of work and while we have 2 weeks to do it some of us have other classes and jobs.

Dear Gus Gus,

Good to see you!!!!

[DreadPirateRoberts]

Dear Bailarín Superior De La Barra,

Lo Siento

Signed,

Your Spanish Teacher