Soooo....

[Lance]

Originally Posted by Betty

Well - turns out that I'm a pretty decent searcher and found her myspace page. I'm half glad and half sorry that I did.

She's in for a world of hurt times 10.

Some troubling things on her page eh?

[Betty]

Well- the fact that she has a page for one. She was expressly forbidden and she's had it since at least june of this year from the comments. And yeah - things that are inappropriate. sheesh

this sux.

As a parent, I wonder if I contact myspace if I can get the page removed. Although we'll be demanding the username and password and that should take care of it.

It's an interesting view into her life. One I certainly wouldn't have gotten if she hadn't taken the camera (the photos from the camera are posted on her page.)

and she wasn't smart enough to make the page private so it's been a real learning experience.

[BarTopDancer]

The problem with MySpace and Facebook is that she can just create a new one using email addresses that she creates on a whim at friends houses and even school. Even if you let her keep it with the explicit rules that you have full access she can create a new one. The best defense is a good offense. Unfortunately there isn't really one of those for these sites.

[Betty]

Well blocking access to the computer at home is a good start. She has time in the morning alone that she's been using for this.

And yeah - I know she can just redo it. Doesn't stop me from letting her know how disappointed in her I am and taking away privledges / doing chores as a consequence.

I'm sad. Frustrated. And frankly concerned about what else is going on I don't know about with Miss Double-Life.

[Capt Jack]

or you could start by posting a comment to her myspace page

"this is your mom. you are SOO freakin' busted! I know all, hear all and see all"

[katiesue]

Maddie's dad let her set up a myspace over the weekend. Moron.

I agree with letting them know that you are looking and on the lookout for stuff like this. Not that you can stop them but at least making them aware you're looking.

I monitor Maddie's phone and text messages. I also have her phone set to upload her address book daily so I can see who's she's got in there. She's 12 and hasn't quite started to rebell yet but I want to lay the groundwork now so she knows I'm looking. She is also under the mistaken impression, which I may not have bothered to correct, that I can actually go online and read her text messages.

Also we have laptops which makes it easier to restrict access. Just unplug them and take them with me. She does have internet on her phone but that can easily be cut if I find an issue.

[madmonkeygirl]

Grrr so my mom calls and says that they're feeding my nephew lunch at the mall and then heading to the condo then she'll come down to get me. It's like noontime already and it's like traffic is already a mess out there. I'd much rather just go to lunch here and the mall and then head up there in traffic screw this. I stayed home and waited for what....grrrr this is why i don't like holidays when i could have been up there already....

[Moonliner]

Huh. So I guess I'm alone in helping my daughter setup a facebook page, showing her how to atomize surfing so as not to leave a trail and how to enable the security features on her phone so only she has access to it?

[Kevy Baby]

BETTY:

I am not in your shoes, but I am wondering: should you let your daughter know that you know? While she has broken rules, are they bad enough to out her at this time? Could you use the new knowledge that you have acquired to keep watch on her?

Yeah: bust her for the camera and the pictures, but maybe keep the MySpace thing to yourself for now, just to see where it might go.

My not-a-parent-but-occasionally-has-insight opinion

[Stan4dSteph]

First thing -- make the MySpace "friends only." Next, remove all inappropriate images. That kind of stuff can come back to haunt you.