Dear:

[BarTopDancer]

Dear co-workers. You are an amazing group of people. I have never felt so welcome. But really, when we say "Don't download LimeWire" please don't get annoyed when it takes me all day to fix your comptuer and I'm still not done.

--------

I pulled over 25 viruses off someones computer today, and found over 150 peices of spyware on it. All due to LimeWire. And I'm still not done.

[Ghoulish Delight]

Originally Posted by BarTopDancer

Dear co-workers. You are an amazing group of people. I have never felt so welcome. But really, when we say "Don't download LimeWire" please don't get annoyed when it takes me all day to fix your comptuer and I'm still not done.

--------

I pulled over 25 viruses off someones computer today, and found over 150 peices of spyware on it. All due to LimeWire. And I'm still not done.

Dear IT Department at BDT's Company,

I highly recommend implementing a responsible data backup policy for all of your employee-use computers. Or, minimally, make sure all business data is on network-access storage. These simple measures will ensure that the systems can be restored from virus/malware damage simply by reinstalling the system without affecting the data. This will also ensure that BTD does not kick you in your "shinies".

- A Friend in the Storage Area Networking business

[BarTopDancer]

Originally Posted by Ghoulish Delight

Dear IT Department at BDT's Company,

I highly recommend implementing a responsible data backup policy for all of your employee-use computers. Or, minimally, make sure all business data is on network-access storage. These simple measures will ensure that the systems can be restored from virus/malware damage simply by reinstalling the system without affecting the data. This will also ensure that BTD does not kick you in your "shinies".

- A Friend in the Storage Area Networking business

Dear A Friend,

BTDs company has all desktop computers mapped to network-access storage drives to prevent issues like this one. Laptops are set to synch with the public drives when docked. What BTDs company needs is enforcement of the synch policy. And I think that may happen now.

But there may still be some kicking of the shinies.

[Kevy Baby]

Dear chin:

Why won't you grow hair? It makes for a less than desirable beard.

Sincerely,
My face

[scaeagles]

Dear Ears,

Please send your excess hair producing capability to Kevy's chin.

Sincerely,
The Tweezers

[wendybeth]

Originally Posted by scaeagles

Dear Ears,

Please send your excess hair producing capability to Kevy's chin.

Sincerely,
The Tweezers

Dear Ears,

I second that request.

Most very truly and sincerely,

A Concerned Hairdresser

[Prudence]

Dear Franco Sarto:

Please stop making cute shoes. There is no more room on my shoe rack!

Your fan,
Me.

[Bornieo: Fully Loaded]

Dear Dick on POTC ride the other night:

Thanks for taking Flash pictures of everything inside the building. I appreciate being repeatedly blinded by your state-of-the-art zenon beam of light. I know it's dark in there and you placing the flash setting at "Fvck'in - A blinding" might have been a tad too much.

I do however would like to offer you 37 pictures of you taking those flash pictures. Unfortunatly I don't have the Fvuk'in A Bright A$$ Zenon Beam of light on my camera, so they're a "little dark."

Sincerely,

My middle finger.

[Motorboat Cruiser]

Dear toilet,

I just want to thank you for your lovely sense of timing. A stomach virus/flu/whatever just wouldn't be as much fun if you were functioning correctly. Since I have to actually open the tank and stick my hand in to manually flush you (due to a broken chain), I can't tell you how pleased I am that I get to play out this scenario every 20 minutes or so. Thanks so much for the memorable evening.

[lashbear]

Dear Pre-processed Food Manufacturers.

Please stop disguising MSG as number 631, 630-635, Hydrolysed vegetable protein etc. etc. etc. and just put "Contains MSG" on your packaging.

Hateful regards,
The Guy Who Stayed Up Till 2:30am Last Night With A Jackhammering Heart And Then Had To Wake This Morning At 5:00am For Work.