Inspiration 2.0

[tracilicious]

Originally Posted by Gemini Cricket

PS ~ So that's what that little pocket is called. A watch pocket. Cool! I always called it my change pocket...

Makes me want a pocket watch!

[LSPoorEeyorick]

Sorry! We've been in Santa Barbara, so Tom has not had the chance to submit, AND I didn't realize that so many people were chomping at the bit at the ball in my court! (So that's what the kids are calling it these days.)

Try this topic on for size:
This Is Not Your Ordinary Fairy Tale

[Gemini Cricket]

Originally Posted by LSPoorEeyorick

This Is Not Your Ordinary Fairy Tale

Princess Denise was loved by all the men in the land. She was pretty, happy and lots of fun to be around. One day she woke up and found that her legs were transformed into squid tentacles.
"Who will love me now?" Princess Denise asked the bathroom mirror...




No.



King Walter Hamptenfitch was the gayest king in all the land. He liked to romp and roll through the forest while singing tunes he remembered from childhood. One day, while picking daisies in the garden, King Walter came across a dying panda bear. The bear looked up at him and said, "I need bamboo..."
King Walter scratched his head with his scepter. "Heavens!" He said.




No.



Ralph, the Gnome Keeper, stood over several gnomes that were bludgeoned to death in the enchanted cave. He looked at the large mallet in his hand and said, "Maybe I shouldn't have done that."






I got nothin' right now, LSPE...

[LSPoorEeyorick]

Hee hee.

The topic is wide open for your interpretation (when you've got somethin'--hee) but I had also been thinking of twisted reinterpretations of existing tales.

Besides, I think that the bludgeoning gnome keeper surely isn't nothin'!

[Capt Jack]

Not Your Ordinary Fairy Tale

A knight at the ready
To conquer the day
To the dragon did march
But fell by the way

The knight would cry out
As loud as he could
For strength not forthcoming
No justice, no good.

No slayer was he
No righter of wrongs
No tales would be told
No verses, no songs

His heart lay in pieces
His limbs cold and numb
His eyes staring blindly
At the world, deaf and dumb

The battle was lost
Long before he’d arrive
No survivors were found
Not one left alive

And the dragon un-stirring
Unmoved by the day
Upon his mountain of death
Still awaiting his prey

No damsels were rescued
No evils undone
No treasures were captured
No walks in the sun

So this story is over
No moral is found
Just an unending silence
As the world keeps turning ‘round.

[Gemini Cricket]

You must spread some Mojo around before giving it to Capt Jack again.

That was wayyy cool.

[Motorboat Cruiser]

What GC said.

Loved it, Captain Jack!

[Gemini Cricket]

"Beauty and the Beast" – The Deleted GC Alternate Ending
by: me

Tears flowed down Belle’s fair face, she laid her head gently upon the Beast’s chest and uttered these words, softly and sadly: “Please don’t leave me! I love you.”

The final petal released itself and fluttered gracefully to the table top.

All was silent for a moment. The only sound that could be heard was the constant ticking coming from Cogsworth.

Suddenly, the skies opened, the rains were replaced with magical blots laden with enchanted dust. The colorful bolts of magic showered down upon the fallen prince. A fog encircled the Beast as he rose off the ground. Belle looked up in wonder and surprise as limb by limb the Beast is transformed. His cape cupped and lowered the Prince’s body to the ground. Belle looked upon a handsome young man lying on the ground.

Lumiere, Mrs. Potts and Cogsworth all gasp in anticipation as they wait for their master to rise to his feet. He does not. They look at each other in wonder. Without warning, Lumiere and Cogsworth are transformed into their human forms. They hug each other happily. Mrs. Potts, however, is not as lucky. A curtain of magical dust surrounded her but as it leaves, we see that she has the body of a human but her head is still a teapot. She screamed, looking at her reflection in the glass windows.

“Mama! Mama!” Chip called from the back of a galloping, barking footstool. Chip and the footstool are transformed into their proper states. Chip looked up at his mother in shock. “Mama?!” The child then erupted in uncontrollable laughter, rolling on the ground holding his stomach.

The laughter was not to last for long. Belle walked up to her prince and put her hand beneath his nostrils. There is no breath. She felt his chest. No heartbeat.

“He’s dead.” Belle uttered sobbing.

Lumiere, Cogsworth, Chip and the dog gasped. Mrs. Potts, meanwhile, began to run around in circles with her palms flat against her porcelain face. Angrily, she wailed: “Tale as old as time, tale as old as time, tale as old as time!”

“Oh la la,” Lumiere said, “this is a disaster.”

The former clock and candelabra, so distracted by the tragedy at hand, looked around them. The once dark and dreary castle was replaced by its equal dressed in white and marble. A shaft of sunlight hit the terrace happily.

“How can this end this way?” Belle sobbed into the prince’s chest. Her tears flow fast like a river to the ocean.

The shaft of sunlight before them flashed from a warm gold to a subtle green. Another rain of magic and a beautiful woman appeared before them in an emerald gown.

“It’s the enchantress!” Lumiere and Cogsworth said in unison.

“Tale as old as time, tale as old as time, tale as old as time!” Muttered Mrs. Potts while she circled the two men.

“This is not your ordinary fairy tale, sister.” The enchantress said to Belle. The beautiful woman knelt next to the fallen prince and shook her head. “Too bad, too. He was quite a dish.” She then looked up at Mrs. Potts, “No offense, sister.”

“But I don’t understand.” Belle said looking into the enchantresses eyes.

“Well,” the enchantress pulled a clipboard chocked with papers from her gown, “you see, it’s like this. The deal was that he had to find true love and she had to love him back. If he did, then I’d turn him back to a human. But I didn’t say nothing about bringing him back to life. That wasn’t part of the deal.”

“But, you could bring him back if you wanted to couldn’t you?” Belle asked.

“No.” the enchantress said scratching her lower back with her wand. “Ain’t you ever been to Enchantress School? I guess not. Curses and Spells 101, dearie. You can’t bring ‘em back to life. It ain’t a pretty picture. Ain’t you ever seen ‘Aladdin’? Anyway, I can’t do it. It wasn’t my fault anyways, blame that Gaston guy.”

“I’m heartbroken.” Belle said sadly.

“Yeah, you should’ve stuck with that fella instead. He had quite a build. Knows how to handle a gun, that Gaston.” The enchantress said. “But I shouldn’t talk about the dearly departed like that.”

“Madam?” Cogsworth cleared his throat. “May I inquire about the current status of our Mrs. Potts? She doesn’t seem to be completely herself.”

“Let’s not get all wound up, Cogsie.” The enchantress said plopping her fists on her waist. “About her, well that’s another kettle of fish. You see, Prince Eustace turned me out of the castle ten years ago.”

“Eustace?” Belle said looking blankly into the horizon.

“The Chipster and his brothers and sisters were all born after the spell took place.” The enchantress fondly messed up Chip’s hair as she spoke. “You’re only allowed so much spell per person. Well, I figured good ‘ol Pottsie here wouldn’t want her kids all half-China, half-human, so she gets the raw end of the deal instead. Sorry, sister, but no one told you to bang all them dancing plates.”

“Tale as old as time, tale as old as time…”

“Why is she doing that?” Lumiere asked.

“Don’t worry about that.” The enchantress said sticking a couple of bobby pins in her hair. “She’s just blowing off a little steam.”

Chip continued his laughing fit on the ground.

“Eustace?” Belle said again.

“Well, I’m going to head downstairs for the auction.” The enchantress said fixing her stockings.

“Auction?” Cogworth wondered aloud.

“Yeah, Eustace here had no next of kin.” The enchantress said. “So, all of this is up for grabs. I got my eye on a really cherry ballroom chandelier. I got the perfect place for it at my summer estate. Gotta run, knickknacks.”

Belle sobbed on.

“Listen. No hard feelings, huh, sister?” The enchantress patted her on the back. “You still got your father. He got that nice gig going on in his basement. Not just anyone can make up stuff like that. You gotta have brains to do that sort of crap.”

“Yes.” Belle said wiping a tear from her chin. “Poppa. I still have my Poppa.”

---------------------

Belle ran through the town and headed towards her house. Her heart raced as she saw the mill wheel turning gracefully greeting her as always. A curious looking kite flew up to the sky from the chimney. Father was at it again. She burst into the house.

“Poppa?” She cried out. “Poppa, where are you?”

“Down here, Belle!” Maurice yelled from the basement.

“Poppa. The most horrible thing happened to me.” She began as she made her way down the basement stairs. She stopped at the bottom of the stairs in shock.

“I heard, Belle. I heard. He’s gone.” Maurice said. “And we’re gonna fix that for you.”

In the middle of the basement was a long steel table connected to electrodes and glass devices that lit up with lightning inside them.

“We’ll bring him here, Belle.” Maurice announced. “I’ll make him well again. Bring him back to life, that’s what we’ll do.”

“Poppa.”

“I have it all set. Any parts that don’t work, we’ll replace. Hee hee, Belle, hee hee.” Maurice began waddling around the basement flapping his arms. He suddenly got down on his hands and knees and poked the ground with his nose. “Bok bok bok, Belle. I’m a chicken!”

“Poppa?” Belle knelt by her father and patted him on the back. ‘Crazy old Maurice.’ She had heard someone say in town. Maybe the town was right about her father, maybe they were right about her too…

Fin

[tracilicious]

I can't mojo you right now, but you crack me up!

[Gemini Cricket]

Originally Posted by tracilicious

I can't mojo you right now, but you crack me up!

Ain't I a stinker?