Pope thanks virgins for 'total gift' to Christ

[Strangler Lewis]

Has anyone made this gender bender movie? A young nun, sexually abused by priests, conspires with her family to pose as her brother, a dying seminarian who miraculously recovers. She is ordained and rises through the church hierarchy, repeatedly abusing some very confused altar boys along the way. Eventually, she is elevated to pope. Then she becomes pregnant by one of the altar boys. Hijinks ensue.

[CoasterMatt]

One of the highlights of my college days was scoring with a "consecrated virgin" - thank you Robert Mondavi (ok, it was probably Boone's Farm or Thunderbird, but firewater was involved)

[lashbear]

One Nun makes sure the other Nun don't get none.

[Alex]

True story:

An uncle of mine was in a horrible car accident (he was in Indiana and my mom and grandmother immediately flew out because they weren't sure he'd make it). When he eventually woke up and came out from under sedation the very first words he said was telling that joke the nun/nurse at his bedside (for some reason he ended up in a Catholic hospital).


"Why do nuns always walk in pairs?..."

[Kevy Baby]

Originally Posted by Alex

"Why do nuns always walk in pairs?..."

So what's the punch? Don't leave me hanging!!!

[Alex]

Lashbear gave the punchline.

[Moonliner]

Can I work at the return desk for these gifts?

[Nephythys]

Originally Posted by LSPoorEeyorick

How about "Pope thanks virgins for the only way permitted for Catholics to reduce the population overgrowth"? That one works for me.

Wait, no it doesn't. What a sad life - not even a nun, and unable to have a life of their own. Do they have the male equivalent of un-priest and virginal? (Of course they don't, they're too low on priests. Why don't they look to the WOMEN to be leaders for a change, hello. Stupid patriarchal....)

These women made a choice- so tell me something- why is it we only honor and respect their choices when it agrees with what we would choose?

Who are you, or me, or anyone else- to decree their life is "sad" and imply they only live that way due to some over-bearing male domination?

Isn't that a tad arrogant and hypocritical?

[LSPoorEeyorick]

Originally Posted by Nephythys

These women made a choice- so tell me something- why is it we only honor and respect their choices when it agrees with what we would choose?

Who are you, or me, or anyone else- to decree their life is "sad" and imply they only live that way due to some over-bearing male domination?

Isn't that a tad arrogant and hypocritical?

I didn't say that they made that choice due to over-bearing male domination. I said they weren't able to choose to be a priest because of it.

And I *do* think their lives are sad. I've known far too many sad priests and nuns not to. Watching them play with children they can never have, watching them look wistfully at happy couples they can never be. And I've known far too many women who make the choice to be nuns because they feel they have no other option. (And many former nuns, too.)

And these women aren't nuns. They are choosing to spend their lives neither connecting fully to other people, nor fully connected in service to the church. It seems, to me, quite a half-life. And - perhaps this is the better phrasing - I would be quite sad to live it that way.

[Strangler Lewis]

Unless one is the Austrian girl chained up in the dungeon, one is making choices. The question is whether the choice is a healthy one or an extreme one that appears to be the product of some coercion.

I will happily criticize both ends of the spectrum. I don't respect and honor the choices these virgins make, and I don't respect and honor the choices made by drunken coeds pretending to be porn lesbians for Girls Gone Wild and the like.