Tell us about your idiot relatives

[Motorboat Cruiser]

Hmm. let's see here...

My maternal grandmother is an ignorant, self-centered racist. Born in the Missouri backwoods, she had a colorful career as a moonshiner and prostitute before moving to California. When my mom was dying of cancer, my grandmother was livid that she couldn't bring her groceries and talk on the phone for hours, even though she has 2 perfectly healthy sons who lived nearby and could have helped out. None of this trio ever bothered to visit my mom in the hospital. They wonder why I don't stay in touch.

On the other side, my cousin is a meth addict who alternates between living on the street and in prison. Her parents, my aunt and uncle who are both in their 60's are raising her 3 children, ages 3-8.

[CoasterMatt]

In my family, I'm the idiot relative

[BarTopDancer]

[Matts MIL] That Matt cannot be trusted with appliances. He has to go and mess with everything.[/Matts MIL]

[Capt Jack]

lets just go with a brief summary. I have no doubt I could overrun the servers storage capacity with raving somewhat self serving tripe.
my lil bro and his daughter are cool (period). by far the only ones I have even in the least any respect for.
the rest run the gamut from gutless twit older brother to inlaws I wouldnt waste ammo on as its far better to let them suffer in their own little biggoted, holier than thou glass house and watch it shatter every time one of them opens their big mouth...

there...I feel much better now.

[Ghoulish Delight]

The only only idiot in my family I had personal experience with was an ex in-law. And what she did isn't worth the digital ink to retell, especially since I was too young to know all the particulars of how things went down.

[€uroMeinke]

While there are family members I could complain about, honestly this thread really makes me think of my own failings as a relative. For the most part I am disconnected with my family. Even those family members I love and respect the most go missing from my consciousness for great periods of time only to emerge for certain holidays, weddings, and funerals. No doubt this makes me the family snob, shunning the joyous company of eveyone else, no doubt I will pay for this with a lonely quiet death, shut away in a home in some rural community without a coast.

[wendybeth]

Originally Posted by €uroMeinke

While there are family members I could complain about, honestly this thread really makes me think of my own failings as a relative. For the most part I am disconnected with my family. Even those family members I love and respect the most go missing from my consciousness for great periods of time only to emerge for certain holidays, weddings, and funerals. No doubt this makes me the family snob, shunning the joyous company of eveyone else, no doubt I will pay for this with a lonely quiet death, shut away in a home in some rural community without a coast.

If you had my family, you'd welcome such an end. They wouldn't leave you alone, though- they'd smell the possibility of an inheritance and be all over you like a swarm of rabid killer bees.

[Capt Jack]

Originally Posted by €uroMeinke

no doubt I will pay for this with a lonely quiet death.

many days, that doesnt sound all that bad to me

"I want to go out like my uncle...resting comfortably in his sleep. Not screaming in fear like his passengers"

[innerSpaceman]

Originally Posted by The LoT

You must mojo anyone before you can mojo Every Single Person Who's Posted to This Thread

Happily, I have nothing to report. I feel so fortunate.




But keep those wonderful, horrible stories coming. This is the most sadly hysterical thread ever.

[tracilicious]

This thread is sadly hysterical, isn't it.

My mom isn't an idiot, but she is a bit weird sometimes. A few days ago I was talking to her on the phone. She's always giving me guilt trips about not telling her about the kids, yadda yadda yadda, so I tell her about something Indi said that I thought was cute.

We went on a field trip to the fire station and Indi was really impressed with the firemen. This led to us talking about what he could be when he grew up, etc. He was thrilled that he could one day be a fireman. A few minutes later, I wanted to know if that desire had stuck or not so I asked him what he wants to be when he grows up. He responded, "An alligator."

So I tell my mom that story, thinking she'll get a grandmotherly kick out of it. She's silent for a few seconds and then says in a completely serious tone, "Oh, dear. He can't be an alligator when he grows up." Gee mom, really? I actually know that, but seeing as how he's three, I think I'll let him live in fantasy for just a bit longer. She was really bothered by it!