Lounge of Tomorrow

€uromeinke, FEJ. and Ghoulish Delight RULE!!! NA abides.  


Go Back   Lounge of Tomorrow > A.S.C.O.T > Open Mic
Swank Swag
FAQ Members List Calendar Today's Posts Clear Unread

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 05-16-2006, 09:39 PM   #31
Motorboat Cruiser
Cruiser of Motorboats
 
Motorboat Cruiser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: So Cal
Posts: 3,665
Motorboat Cruiser is the epitome of coolMotorboat Cruiser is the epitome of coolMotorboat Cruiser is the epitome of coolMotorboat Cruiser is the epitome of coolMotorboat Cruiser is the epitome of coolMotorboat Cruiser is the epitome of coolMotorboat Cruiser is the epitome of coolMotorboat Cruiser is the epitome of coolMotorboat Cruiser is the epitome of coolMotorboat Cruiser is the epitome of coolMotorboat Cruiser is the epitome of cool
Send a message via Yahoo to Motorboat Cruiser
Wow, LSPE, that was just wonderful.
Motorboat Cruiser is offline   Submit to Quotes Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2006, 09:39 PM   #32
blueerica
Nueve
 
blueerica's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 6,497
blueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of cool
Send a message via AIM to blueerica Send a message via Yahoo to blueerica Send a message via Skype™ to blueerica
She lay flat on her back wondering why sand always gets, well… you know… It’s not like John would notice if she pulled the bottom out a little to shake some of it out, then she wouldn’t have to pad back to the hotel or jump back into the cold water. She was so toasty-warm already… John snored lightly.

She stood up, tugged gently, and felt the right tie loosen. Sh*t! Who is that creep over there? Why does the beach feel crowded all of a sudden?

When I’m sad, she comes to me
With a thousand smiles, she gives to me free


Running through the front door, the smell of eggs, mayonnaise and mustard slaps her across the face. But it’s a gentle slap. Maybe pickles? MMmm…. She could smell the barbeque sauce, too. Mom gives a sideways glance at the dirty little girl running through the living room into the kitchen. I just vacuumed...

Ay candela, candela, candela, me quemo aé!

Her hips swayed with his to the beat, tapping their entire bodies to the congo drums, the bongo beat. Dark room, shoulders brushing, shoulders back, chest out, chin up, back and forth and forth and back. One-Two-Three-Four. Ruffles and sweat, roses, candles…

¡Y ahora si quieren bailar, búsquense
otro timbalero!


Little One coos against her chest, full from the Gerber Peas and Carrots… Laughter. Smiles. Bright blue eyes, just like John’s. Glad she got that pretty ocean blue from him. Good thing she’s got mama's nose. Maybe she’ll be a teacher, a singer, a doctor? Wow, maybe. She could be President. Or a janitor.


Work It Harder Make It Better
Do It Faster, Makes Us stronger
More Than Ever Hour After
Our Work Is Never Over


Tum-tum-tum-tum-tum-tum…
Feet pounding to the rhythm in her headphones.
Tum-tum-tum-tum-tum-tum…
Past the corner store…
Tum-tum-tum-tum-tum-tum…
Keep going… Breathing hard…
Tum-tum-tum-tum-tum-tum…
God, why do I feel so panicky?
Tum-tum-tum-tum-tum-tum…
Cross the street to the park…
Pick up the pace… faster… faster…
Tum-tum-tum-tum-tum-tum…
Who’s behind me?

Tum-tum-tum-tum-tum-tum…
Smacked in the face with a stray branch…
Faster…
Tum-tum-tum-tum-tum-tum…
What! Where am I? This…
Where am I going?

Tum-tum-tum-tum-tum-tum…


With all your power
What would you do?


Startled by the alarm, I straightened up and slammed the palm of my hand across the snooze button. One eye open, it’s 7:45… Maybe I can get another 10 minutes… Yeah… Why does this apartment have to always smell like cigarettes?
__________________
Tomorrow is the day for you and me
blueerica is offline   Submit to Quotes Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2006, 09:39 PM   #33
blueerica
Nueve
 
blueerica's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 6,497
blueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of cool
Send a message via AIM to blueerica Send a message via Yahoo to blueerica Send a message via Skype™ to blueerica
Yeah, H pretty much astounded me.
__________________
Tomorrow is the day for you and me
blueerica is offline   Submit to Quotes Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2006, 09:49 PM   #34
Cadaverous Pallor
ohhhh baby
 
Cadaverous Pallor's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Parental Bliss
Posts: 12,364
Cadaverous Pallor is the epitome of coolCadaverous Pallor is the epitome of coolCadaverous Pallor is the epitome of coolCadaverous Pallor is the epitome of coolCadaverous Pallor is the epitome of coolCadaverous Pallor is the epitome of coolCadaverous Pallor is the epitome of coolCadaverous Pallor is the epitome of coolCadaverous Pallor is the epitome of coolCadaverous Pallor is the epitome of coolCadaverous Pallor is the epitome of cool
Send a message via AIM to Cadaverous Pallor Send a message via Yahoo to Cadaverous Pallor
Erica - didn't see it coming. What a great way to show off your grasp of the moment.
__________________
The second star to the right
shines in the night for you
Cadaverous Pallor is offline   Submit to Quotes Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2006, 09:56 PM   #35
blueerica
Nueve
 
blueerica's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 6,497
blueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of coolblueerica is the epitome of cool
Send a message via AIM to blueerica Send a message via Yahoo to blueerica Send a message via Skype™ to blueerica
Haha, I keep reading it over and over - and I can't help but wonder if anyone knows why I wrote it this way. It barely makes sense to me... /shrug
__________________
Tomorrow is the day for you and me
blueerica is offline   Submit to Quotes Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2006, 10:04 PM   #36
wendybeth
Nevermind
 
wendybeth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 7,847
wendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of cool
Send a message via Yahoo to wendybeth
Man, I am just so impressed with these stories- seriously impressed.

LS- I loved everything about your story. I agree with CP and Erica wholeheartedly- you nailed it down.

Erica- I loved the layers of your story. I don't know how to articulate it, except to describe it as layered, and each part (excepting the spanish, which I suck at) I could identify with. I know something has struck home when I can personalize it, and yours struck home.I'll think of it tomorrow when I hit the snooze button.......

CP- really, you rock for starting this!
__________________









wendybeth is offline   Submit to Quotes Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2006, 10:14 PM   #37
LSPoorEeyorick
scribblin'
 
LSPoorEeyorick's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: in the moment
Posts: 3,872
LSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of coolLSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of coolLSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of coolLSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of coolLSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of coolLSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of coolLSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of coolLSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of coolLSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of coolLSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of coolLSPoorEeyorick is the epitome of cool
Quote:
Originally Posted by blueerica
...I can't help but wonder if anyone knows why I wrote it this way. It barely makes sense to me... /shrug
I just said it to you, but I'll say it out here, too. I really don't think that something has to be obvious or resolved for it to resonate with an audience.

Everyone's pieces are really terrific, all very evocative. This thread always fascinated me in the way it always reveals how different points of view can run with a small idea. (And how it reveals just how many excellent writers we have among us. Good work, all!)

More people should contribute, too! I know Tom is hoping to get a piece up before this one closes. Is there an ETA for closing?

By the way, CP, are you looking for future theme ideas? I have one...
LSPoorEeyorick is offline   Submit to Quotes Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2006, 10:23 PM   #38
wendybeth
Nevermind
 
wendybeth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 7,847
wendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of coolwendybeth is the epitome of cool
Send a message via Yahoo to wendybeth
LS is absolutely right- I like having to think about something, and I only want to think about something if it hits home with me. I don't care to be spoon-fed the story anymore than I want to have someone else tell me how I should feel about a work of art. If I want that, I can read some of those stupid Nora Roberts books one of my clients insists on bringing me......


(MY client is an absolute sweetheart, but I don't have the courage to tell her I don't like that crap, so I just smile and hope she doesn't ask for a book report).
__________________









wendybeth is offline   Submit to Quotes Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2006, 10:49 PM   #39
tracilicious
avatar transition
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: in-between
Posts: 2,487
tracilicious is the epitome of cooltracilicious is the epitome of cooltracilicious is the epitome of cooltracilicious is the epitome of cooltracilicious is the epitome of cooltracilicious is the epitome of cooltracilicious is the epitome of cooltracilicious is the epitome of cooltracilicious is the epitome of cooltracilicious is the epitome of cooltracilicious is the epitome of cool
Send a message via MSN to tracilicious Send a message via Yahoo to tracilicious
Not a story, just a thought...

Sometimes when I'm reading, I feel as though I have a phoenix sitting in my lap. I feel my fingertips singe as I open the cover, the first sparks of his pyre already igniting. The fire burns slowly at points, barely a crackle. Other times it burns so bright and hot that my eyes can only focus on the blue bright flame. Feathers of words burn off and flitter around me as I fly and bounce over the text.

The more I read the more the fire blazes the nakeder my regal bird gets. Until finally, I'm staring at the last sentence and my phoenix is sitting vulnerable in the ashes of the dust jacket. We stare at each other for a while, then we look away for a while, then he flutters back to his shelf while I stare at traffic and try to digest what just happened between us.

I shoot him lingering glances as I pass by, trying to discern if we're ready for another go. Sometimes his plumage is bright and beautiful again right away and we dive right back in. Other times he needs a month or more to recover, so I pass the time with travel literature and organic cookbooks, waiting for him to call. Then there are the times when I've gotten a bit too close to the fire, so I ignore his phoenix song, unable to bear the pain of the heat again so soon.

Eventually though, I unfailingly approach him and extend my arm for him to perch on and we sit down again together, ready to burn and be left naked once again.
__________________
And now Harry, let us step into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, adventure! - Albus Dumbledore

tracilicious is offline   Submit to Quotes Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2006, 11:22 PM   #40
Bornieo: Fully Loaded
Lego
 
Bornieo: Fully Loaded's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Disneyland, USA
Posts: 3,704
Bornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of coolBornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of coolBornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of coolBornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of coolBornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of coolBornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of coolBornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of coolBornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of coolBornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of coolBornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of coolBornieo: Fully Loaded is the epitome of cool
Send a message via Yahoo to Bornieo: Fully Loaded Send a message via Skype™ to Bornieo: Fully Loaded
Somewhat of a work in progress...

Title: Ge=

It was the happiest little red dot that ever lived and it was named Ge. It was formed not more than 20 seconds ago in the brain of the one it-which it was born and lived. Its journey was swift and quick as it skipped across the nerves, of the one in-which it was born and lived. Happy and joyous it sang as it passed blood, dna, snot, earwax, vocal patterns and the tiny molecules that live within the one in-which it was born. It skipped, danced, bopped, hopped, jigged, waltzed, twirled, shooked, leaped, tapped, boogied, grooved, swayed, and generally was having a real swanky time. It rolled, walked, bounced and ran with the joy of 100 volts of pure delight as it moved towards the heart of the one in-which it was born and lived. At the door of the heart of the one in-which it was born and lived, Ge found a line up of about 30 other similar red dots, all doing various things like reading a newspaper, there was one playing poker with another red dot. Moving down the line it came across a red dot that was lying on the floor. It was holding a pistol and had a distinctive hole in the center of it’s head. Next to it was a darker red dot who spoke in a slow as molasses vocal pattern saying that Ge should “not worry, it was bored.” Confused Ge moved down the line and saw that the other red dots had become darker and darker and the surface of the bubble, which its was smooth shinny and vivid, became wrinkled and dusty. By the time Ge got to the front of the line up, it couldn no longer see its reflection in the dull, beat up, aged very first red dot.

Ge asked “What are you doing standing here?”

“We are waiting to get into the heart of the one in-which I was born and lived!” said slothfully the dull dark red dot.

“Oh?” asked Ge “How odd, I just came down as I was created no more than 30 seconds ago in the brain of the one in-which I was born and lived. Can I get in?”

“Be my guest,” said the old dot “if you can get in, you’re better than I.”

Ge walked up to the large steel door that was dark gray and was covered with rivets, chains and a huge “Master” brand lock with one of those combination dials in-which the numbers were all 7’s. Gently Ge knocked. BANG! The noise echoed and everyone still awake in the line up grabbed their ears in pain.

“Knock it off asshole” said one.

Not giving up, Ge moved closer to the door to listen if there was anything on the other side. “Bu-bump, bu-bump” And it went on and on. Not loud, but enough to know it was there.

“What must I do?” asked Ge blankly.

“Go back to end of the line ya jerk!” came a voice.

“Must I? Ge questioned. “I am here to get in. I came from above and I was born no more than 35 seconds ago in the brain of the one in-which I was born and lived! I need to make my way into the heart!.

“Shut the hell up!” Came the voice again, and from that voice came an appendage that grabbed hold of Ge and forced it to the back of the line. “Can’t you read the sign!?!”

Ge looked up and in gigantic neon green letters it read “Closed”

“What does that mean?”

“It means the heart is closed off. There’s no way in you stupid bastard. We’ve been waiting here for years tryin’ to get in, but the one in-which we were born and lived has sealed it off from us.” Gripped a similarly red dot that was frowning and standing firmly in front of Ge. “Get used to it, non of us are getin’ in.”

“But I’m bringing everything with me! I have it all! All for the one in-which I was born and lived. How can I be refused!” Again Ge questioned.

Ge marched back to door more determined than ever. It waited silently for another 10 seconds. “Hear me heart of the one in-which I was born and live! I come bringing things for you. I bring you everything you desire! The past, the present and the future! It is everything! Open up, let me in and you can feast on the eternal in-which I bring. Hear me!”

Ge waited.

Ge remained.

Ge was.

483 seconds after leaving the brain of the one in-which it was born and lived, Ge entered. The flash of light was blinding beyond all. The sound was thunderous beyond all. The force was powerful beyond all.

“What happened?” asked the old faded Red dot.

“That my brother ... was the one.”
Bornieo: Fully Loaded is offline   Submit to Quotes Reply With Quote
Reply



Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:51 PM.


Lunarpages.com Web Hosting

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.