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Old 04-08-2007, 07:53 AM   #7701
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Somehow I'm guessing they cost more than they save in taxes.

Gambling losses are also a good write-off but I still try to avoid having those.
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Old 04-08-2007, 09:22 AM   #7702
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I can totally understand feelings not wanting to be changed if you either can't or have taken care of the decision of not having kids.

Really, it is all in the parents. That whimpering kid, you don't know why he was. {Oh, I should add I haven't seen/read 'Children of Men', I've seen the preview but that's it}.

Some parents think their kids are the best shiet there is only to ruin them. Never discipline them, give them everything they want.

Other parents think their kids are such a pain, such a burden to their lives that they don't appreciate them.

It is hard to find that medium, where you appreciate them, love them, yet try and make them ready to hit the road someday.

And of course, some kids, who grow up to be people just like you and me, are just off. You can't know. And, I don't know 100% if this isn't also due to birthorder/parenting. Also, lack of parenting skills.

BUT It is all a personal decision. We almost had that taken from us and miraculously we have 3 kids. I know people who also decided not to have kids and really, it is your own business.

Just don't blame the kids. Behind every rotten kid is a parent. Listen to them for a minute and you'll see how they became that way.

All that aside, it is not an easy job. That is probably why some parents don't discipline their kids. It shuts them up but then it trains the kid to be like that always. I told my kids {and nephew whom I had for a year} 'The more you ask isn't going to change my answer. No is no.'

{and no, my kids aren't perfect but I would never trade them for anything or any other kid...}
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Old 04-08-2007, 09:34 AM   #7703
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Originally Posted by Mousey Girl View Post
I just can't imagine starting over with diapers and the mess of a baby, not to mention the cost.
That's certainly how we felt after two. Three or more, though, is just ostentatious.

As I think I've said before, having been an only child, I didn't miss having siblings--until my parents got old.
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Old 04-08-2007, 10:09 AM   #7704
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I'm not complaining about the kid or questioning anybody who has them.

I was just amused by myself and the thought that I found going through my head.
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Old 04-08-2007, 10:45 AM   #7705
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That's certainly how we felt after two. Three or more, though, is just ostentatious.
My parents really wanted a son. After two girls, they said to themselves, "OK, we'll have just one more. We'll stop at three, regardless."

And my next sister was born, to which they said, "OK; we'll try just one more time, and we will absolutely stop at four."

You guessed it: my fourth older sister was born.

So they let a couple of years lapse, and say, "Alright, just ONE more try for a boy, and if it is a girl, we'll absolutely stop there."

They finally got what they wanted and I ended up with four older sisters. Though Susan often thinks I act like a girl, so maybe my parents didn't really get what they wanted.
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Old 04-08-2007, 01:17 PM   #7706
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As I think I've said before, having been an only child, I didn't miss having siblings--until my parents got old.
That's what I am going through right now. Thankfully I have been blessed with an amazing "family" of friends and I know I will never be "alone". I do miss having someone to reminisce with about things that we did as kids - though on some level I have a few people I can do that with, since I have known one since I was 3 and one that I have known since the 3rd grade.

I wanted kids up until a few years ago. Right now I can't imagine having them and I don't think I'd be a good parent right now. Maybe someday. In the far future.
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Old 04-08-2007, 01:43 PM   #7707
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Originally Posted by Alex Stroup View Post
I'm not complaining about the kid or questioning anybody who has them.

I was just amused by myself and the thought that I found going through my head.

Yeah, I get it. Don't think I've had those thoughts? I know I've told my kids when they've acted up 'Aw come on now kids, you are scaring that lady out of having kids'. Or {under my breath} 'I bet that lady remembers to take her pill today'.

This reminds me of my single nephew {my age} telling my husband as a motorcycle screamed across the highway behind us 'Yeah, don't you ever think of just hopping on one of those and leaving this all behind?' which pissed me the hell off, my nephew telling my husband that??? But I cooly responded 'Don't we all'.

Ya know, this is one of the first really stress free Easters we are having. It does have to do with the kids being bigger. A token egg hunt, color a bit of eggs just for fun, and, a bbq that they are inviting their friends over for.
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Old 04-08-2007, 06:14 PM   #7708
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Well... Forgive me, I need to vent, and cry and rage.

All this baby talk... I just found out that David is having a baby. Due in the next monnth or 2. I had no idea. I just got home from his parents, who found out when Dawn sent them a baby shower invitation. I am beyond hurt at this point. Trying to formulate wha tall I need to do tomorrow to get the ball rolling as far as laywer, bank account (which is still open, with money in it). I feel like such a stupid idiotic fool. I am in total shock. How can this be happening to me? to Nick????? David's parents could not have been nicer to me, supportive, caring. They too are in shock. His dad is pissed beyond belief. I have never seen him that angry at anyone, let alone his son.

David got his wish. He has taken over Jimmy's life. too bad it is at the expense of his son's love. Nick is upset. He said they had told him something, but he didn't fully understand it all.

I'm gonna be sik.
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Old 04-08-2007, 07:22 PM   #7709
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UGH! Vent, cry and rage all you want because, he's one giant asshat and you don't deserve this.
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Old 04-08-2007, 08:00 PM   #7710
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Mousey Girl~

I agree with NA. You don't deserve this.

Go through what you need to and do what you need to, you have every right.

I am so sorry that he turned out to be such a disappointment in you and your sons' lives.
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