Robber shoots himself in the nuts.

[Ghoulish Delight]

Hahaha, nimrod squeezed a shot off while trying to tuck the gun into his wasteband.

http://www.kokomotribune.com/local/local_story_015084453.html

[Capt Jack]

I wonder if this would qualify as a Dawin candidate if he in fact killed off any future decendants

[Alex]

Technically anything that prevents reproduction should count, I'd think.

[Ghoulish Delight]

If they're true to their namesake's line of reasoning, it certainly should.

[JWBear]

Rules: (http://darwinawards.com/rules/)

The candidate must remove herself from the gene pool.

The prime tenet of the Darwin Awards is that we are celebrating the self-removal of incompetent genetic material from the human race. Therefore, the potential winner must be deceased, or at least incapable of reproducing. The traditional method is death. However, an occasional rebel opts for sterilization, which allows her more time to enjoy the dubious notoriety of winning a Darwin Award.

[Alex]

Yeah, but if they're going to follow those rules they have to rule out homosexuals, post-menopausal women, and me.

Though maybe that would finally be some compensation for these oppressed (to some degree or another over various times; I've been horribly oppressed through the years) groups: "Congratulations, no matter how stupid your actions you will not win a Darwin Award!"

[Disneyphile]

I wonder if he'll have the balls to repeat the crime.

[Bornieo: Fully Loaded]

What a nutjob...

[Ghoulish Delight]

Testicle pun.

[JWBear]

Yeah, but if they're going to follow those rules they have to rule out homosexuals, post-menopausal women, and me.

Though maybe that would finally be some compensation for these oppressed (to some degree or another over various times; I've been horribly oppressed through the years) groups: "Congratulations, no matter how stupid your actions you will not win a Darwin Award!"

No. You have to remove yourself in a manner that is spectacularly stupid and ill-advised . Suicides, unforeseen accidents, murders, and those who choose not to have children do not qualify.

[JWBear]

Here's a quote from the rules section:

We are not talking about common stupidities such as falling asleep with a lit cigarette, or taking a bath with a radio. The fatal act must be of such idiotic magnitude that we shake our heads and thank our lucky stars that our descendants won't have to deal with, or heaven forbid, breed with descendants of the fool that set that hare-brained scheme in motion.

[Alex]

Yes, but my point is there is nothing horrendously stupid I could do that would qualify me for a Darwin Award because I was removed from the gene pool 8 years ago.

So it is a free pass. I could kill myself by going hunting with Dick Cheney and it wasn't a stupid act that removed me from the gene pool!


(PS: I know, I am just being pedantically picky. But I happen to know, repeatedly, for a fact that this is a group of people that likes to be pedantically picky about rules and instructions.)

[Isaac]

I'm watching Gilligans Islands. The Howells suspect someone wrote a love note to Mrs. Howell

[Ghoulish Delight]

So it is a free pass. I could kill myself by going hunting with Dick Cheney and it wasn't a stupid act that removed me from the gene pool!
I dunno...while you've chosen to not be an active participant, you're not ENTIRELY out of the gene pool. Your more like a non-rostered player still on the payroll. I mean, you COULD still breed, either due to a change in your choices or some bizarre circumstance/accident. Unless you've been snipped (but even that's got a chance of being reversible).

Post-menopausal you've got an argument.

[RStar]

He only shot off his left nut. He could, in fact, still pass on some genes through his right nut. However, I doubt he'll be getting anyone preggy anytime soon in prisson. And then, God help us, the type of girl that he would knock up couldn't have her ducks in a row if she goes out with some ex con self ball shooter.

[NickO'Time]

Is his new name the Uni-Baller?;) :D

[wendybeth]

He only shot off his left nut. He could, in fact, still pass on some genes through his right nut. However, I doubt he'll be getting anyone preggy anytime soon in prisson. And then, God help us, the type of girl that he would knock up couldn't have her ducks in a row if she goes out with some ex con self ball shooter.

Precisely why it is imperative that he qualifies for the Darwin award. Maybe they should put him in a safe room with a pistol so he can finish off the other side. People like him (including anyone who might actually want to breed with him) should not be allowed to pass on whatever semblance of a genetic code they may posses.

[RStar]

Precisely why it is imperative that he qualifies for the Darwin award. Maybe they should put him in a safe room with a pistol so he can finish off the other side. People like him (including anyone who might actually want to breed with him) should not be allowed to pass on whatever semblance of a genetic code they may posses.

:snap: :snap:

[Alex]

Unless you've been snipped (but even that's got a chance of being reversible).

Bingo. Yes, the chance is not zero since in this modern technological age there is no such thing as being alive and completely removed from the gene pool (in a decade or so it would be possible to clone me and have that copy reproduce sexually or use my stem cells to create sperm cells that could be combined with an ovum) but I'm about as close to zero as it is possible to get.

[CoasterMatt]

Is his new name the Uni-Baller?;) :D

He shoots, he SCORES!!!

[RStar]

Yes, but there is always hope....

[Alex]

Hope for me? That's not hope I want and any hope that exists better be false hope.

[RStar]

You are the eternal optomist, Alex. That's why we love you so much! :D

[Alex]

Yes, I'm eternally optimistic that I won't have kids, I've worked hard to make sure that is what happens so anything else would be a disappointment.

Maybe I'm misreading your comments but it sounds like you think me reproducing would be the good outcome.

[RStar]

Well, to each his own. If you don't want kids, that's your option and I respect that. And I hope Lani is in agreement, of course.

But you are a bright guy, and what I've seen of you, your offspring should be a benifit to the world.

My wife and I chose zero population growth, and had one boy and one girl. Those who don't have any kids help the cause for those who choose big families (for those looking at the environmental impact of the subject).

But as for the gene pool, the robber who shoots his own nuts is the real low end, and as far as I'm concerned yours would be the upper end. (This isn't meant as false flattery, it's just my opinion).