We actually touched briefly on this topic the last time I was with the LoT gals. It's still my body image. Or yours, or whomevers. Everyone has done growing in the last few years, and someone who might be more comfortable in their skin now, might not have been two years ago.
I am not comfortable in my curves, in my face, in my hair. But, truly, nothing you can do will change that.

I spent a long time being told I was too this, or too that. And whats the Pretty Woman line? Its a lot easier to believe the bad stuff than it is the good?

I know I'm curvy, its painfully obvious. But I also know who I see everyday of my life, and they are not curvy. Or at least, not the same kind of curvy.
I wondered once, what would it be like if I ran into a phtographer, that could take a picture, that maybe didnt show face, or anything x rated, but was able to make me look pretty.
To help me see what someone sees that likes what they are looking at.

Somehow, I tend to miss the group photo's. I just wasnt there when they happened. Otherwise, I just dont naturally gravitate to a camera.
Hence, there tends to be little photographic evidence that I am ever actually anywhere. I'm actually a phantom. And you know, with the amount of cameras at meets you would think that this would not be the case!
So, in truth it is not ALL avoidance.
But yes, at 145 I was told I was fat. Just imagine how knowing the scale says 200+ feels now. :rolleyes:

Ironically, when I was 145, I wore a size 9, only because of height. and in '87, a 9 was huge. I bought most of my clothes through catalogs even then.

Ah, the one thing I retained from MaryKay training. Never look at your face/makeup at a distance of less than 2 feet. No one else will be closer than that distance, and anyone who is, doesnt care what your makeup looks like.


I agree with you, which is why you dont hear me whining about my height.
Doesnt mean that I have the motivation or confidence to go fix it.

For a good novel on the subject of body image, I recommend "The Earth, My Butt and Other Big Round Things," by Carolyn Mackler. The ultimate message that comes through is that fat is a health issue that should be addressed but that you should not let others obsess over what your ideal body type should be. Food should not be a substitue for love or other positive feelings, any more than guys should be--as Mackler so deftly demonstrates in "Guyaholic," her most recent book.

It was a long plane flight.

I realized there are people on this board who have known me a various weights. When Chris met me, I was 123 lbs and skinny skinny (and gross!). That was my absolute thinnest and I'd NEVER want to go back there (and I was still not "model material"). I've mostly fluctuated between 140 and 190 but even at 150 I'm not "thin".

I find that if "thin" is a goal, I'm never going to make it (and I'm not sure I really should want to). The only advantage I have when I'm thin is that clothes fit better because I'm a coat hanger. But, do I really want to BE thin? In actuality, probably not. I like curves and softness. It's much more attractive and certainly feels better to the body cuddling with yours. But, even knowing that, I still secretly hope for "thin" again one day. That's pretty dangerous thinking.

I'm currently trying to lose weight. Mostly because I know I've got genes against me. Both of my parents made it into their late 20s/early 30s at average weights, and then quickly began the slide into obesity. For my dad, it became diabetes, near fatal infection, and a stroke. My mom has blood pressure and cholesterol issues and struggled for decades with the weight.

Fortunately they have both gotten things under control in recent years, and fortunately for me I share my Dad's trait of being able to lose the weight "simply" by reducing calories and increasing activity. The hard part is doing that because I share my mom's love for the act of eating.

I've seen my future if I don't pay attention now. I'll never be skinny. I'll never be ripped. I am looking forward to losing the belly and love handles. I know I'm far from obese at my current weight, but when I started is was the heaviest I've ever been (pushing 200lbs) and no, I did not particularly feel good about looking in the mirror. But mostly it didn't feel good to feel like crap because I over-ate nearly every day at lunch, or not be able to make it up and down a soccer field more than twice without wanting to keel over. And it definitely didn't feel good staring down a future of weight-related disease that I'm more than likely prone to.

Oh, and as a side benefit, Wii Boxing (my preferred workout vehicle) has given my shoulders and biceps some awesome definition. That I can live with.

All our LoT women are beautiful inside and out.

I'll never be smaller than an 8 (which is not what I am now) because I have hips. I like my hips and I'd be happy to be an 8. I'd love to lose about 30lbs. That would put me at a healthy weight that I would be happy with.

As I get older I notice how certain foods effect me. I've mostly cut out HFCS and I can tell when I eat something that contains it. A lot of overly processed foods make me feel sluggish, so I try to avoid them - though I'll still eat them if the mood hits. I know Spaghetti Os will put me in a food coma. But they are so yummy.

Eating healthier, and exercising is the way I hope to accomplish my weight loss - which I would like to do to become healthier, and lower my risk of heart issues and diabetes.

If I lost 30 lbs, I'd be 186. I could happily deal with that.

Hell, I'm ecstatic just to find out that I'm 216.

I've been floating between 225-240 for the last couple years, so it's all a matter of perspective.

My goal is to grow 3 inches vertically by the end of the year. I eat well and exercise right. Wish me luck!

Losing weight can seem just as impossible at times. With the added hatefulness of the world thinking we can "just diet" and make it all right.