[Kevy Baby]

I want to grow up.

I know that sounds like my typical flippant remark, but I actually mean it. I have just let life come to me as it has and not really made much effort to guide things where I wanted them to go. But then to do this, I guess I need to decide where I want it to go.

I am actually ashamed of my complete lack of motivation right now. (For those who don't know, I was let know of my job in mid November.). There are a lot of things I COULD do, but nothing that I can think of that I WANT to do.

So, obviously, one of my goals for 2012 is to get a job. Despite the economy, I know I will get one soon, but whether it is something that will inspire me or be at the same pay level as before remains to be seen.

But this apathy is not just about employment; it extends to my personal life as well. It has been a long time since I have felt inspired to want to make my life better. I have had a LOT of free time over the past six or so weeks and really have done nothing with this time.

Not sure what I can do to turn this around: just thought I would start making myself accountable.