All About McCain

[Strangler Lewis]

With Palin's selection and the related events of the past week, the campaign has taken a strange turn. Where once it was Christian morality vs. Hollywood debauchery, now it seems that you're not a real American unless you're life is, well, Springeresque. I predict we'll hear more tawdry personal revelations about her family in the coming weeks that will be exploited towards this end. I expect McCain will appear on the platform tonight with his first wife and his old girlfriends.

The Democrats will try to respond in kind, but they won't get it right. Obama will start smoking more in public, but he'll look more like a 60's intellectual smoker than a working class smoker. He'll yell at his wife in public. Beau Biden will agree to come out as gay--even though he's really not--and Joe Biden will show up at debates drunk talking about how much he loves his gay son.