Isn't everything the worst?

[BarTopDancer]

If stuff everywhere is bugging you, you might want to check out unclutterer.com. They have really good suggestions for breaking down the clutter and getting motivated with what precious time is available.

If you can identify what "stuff" is bugging you, you can get a grasp on how to handle it. Does Theo still have clothes out that are now too small? Or toys he is now too old for? Those could be packed away into containers by size for future use or donation. Would that help with some of the "damn there is crap everywhere and its' getting on my nerves"?

How about a basket by the stairs for everything that has to go upstairs so you aren't running up and down putting stuff away. That one is easy and requires one step of prep work. Stick a basket or bag on the stairs to put crap in to take upstairs.

I know how aggravating it can be to have every surface covered in stuff. My place is like that now... I have no one to blame but myself and I still don't want to clean it up.

[alphabassettgrrl]

I find cleaning and organizing is easier to handle in little bits.. If I see a thing out of place, or randomly someplace, I try to find a place for it. Right now, which takes maybe 30 seconds.

Of course, the downside is that here, stuff builds up at a rate of many things a minute it seems, so I'm still losing the battle, but at least a few things are right. I also find certain times of the day and month are better for me to clean and organize. I try to get as much done when that bug hits as I can, knowing it will be two weeks before I get the right hormones again.

Not sure how to defuse your rage; meditation? Or does that increase your stress because it's one more thing on the to-do list? Or can you channel the anger into getting a few things put away? Sometimes I can do that; things are in my way so I put them away. Cleaning and organizing calms me, on those occasions I get to do it.

When you feel negative, can you maybe come up with something positive to counter it? Just in your head. Like, I hate vacuuming, but at least we have new carpet, so it looks nice when I do manage to get it done.

[Betty]

I guess this isn't a good thread to ask for another blog update with Theo pic's?

[BarTopDancer]

Originally Posted by Betty

I guess this isn't a good thread to ask for another blog update with Theo pic's?

Only if you help tidy up.

[Betty]

Originally Posted by BarTopDancer

Only if you help tidy up.

I have a hard enough time of that at home ya know.

[cirquelover]

I have to agree with everything Moonliner said but I'm not sure how to help you let the anger go. I decided when Zach was little what was important to me and that was more time with him. Now Gary was always more about the clean drawers or organized house but he was always capable of doing some things for himself too. You have Theo to care for and that is more than a full time job to occupy all your time.

I guess maybe if you try to prioritize what is most important to get done and try to accomplish that in small chunks. Ask for help when needed but know that you two may have different priorities. It's not that easy when kids are little, you have to keep a good eye on them.

Although I'm starting to think a teen can be just as bad

Hang in there and try not to be too hard on yourself.

[Not Afraid]

I mostly (not all of the time, mind you) decided that I had limited time and energy and that, being the one solely in control of who I use that time and energy, decided that I would choose what I chose to do - which is be on the happier side of things.

I also came to the realization my my feelings were a CHOICE. I could actually choose to be angry or I could choose NOT to be angry. It seems easier to choose NOT to feel the negative things than it does choosing to feel the happy stuff - but when really great moods come along, I'm ecstatic! Most of the time I'm just reasonably happy. And, I can accept reasonable happy.

Oh, and I don't hang much or often with constantly negative people. It gets to me after a while and pulls down my mood - plus they generally tend to be a drag.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Thanks, everyone, for the tips. They really are helpful.

Originally Posted by katiesue

As for getting stuff done I find if I break stuff down. Not I will clean the whole house but today I'll do the toilets, tomorrow the tub, Thursday the kitchen counter, then it doesn't seem so overwhelming. And if I get on a roll and do more fabulous. And if I'm thrashed it just doesn't happen.

This has been my MO for the last 6 months. If all I can do is wash 3 dishes before Theo decides it's time to do something else, that's what I do. At least I washed something.

Originally Posted by Betty

Not necessarily true though. GD could come home and take the baby off your hands for 1/2 hour for you to do whatever - including doing nothing at all.

This is one of those things that is true and yet not true at the same time. Most days, if I am in the room, Theo wants me and makes a fuss. If I want to really hand him off, it can require sequestering myself. I've been making dinner as much as I can but often it's impossible, as he won't put up with GD as long as he knows I'm nearby. I'm not one to shut myself in a room alone and read a book, but I guess I'd have to if I really wanted alone time.

However, as I type this, GD is playing with Theo and he's just fine. In fact, Theo let me get a lot done today. He's eating more and sleeping more - signs of a growth spurt - and it makes him a lot happier and able to play while I do chores with him around.

Originally Posted by Betty

I guess this isn't a good thread to ask for another blog update with Theo pic's?

Heehee. I know I'm way behind on that, too. His birthday is coming up so there will definitely be an update then.

[katiesue]

An Exersaucer is what saved me - she was safe near me happy and playing but she couldn't actually go anywhere so I could get something done. Playpens worked well too.

[Not Afraid]

Stolen from a friend's FB:

Thinking of Having Kids? Do this 11 step program first!

Lesson 1
1. Go to the grocery store.
2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.
3. Go home.
4. Pick up the paper.
5. Read it for the last time.

Lesson 2
Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...
1. Methods of discipline.
2. Lack of patience.
3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.
4. Allowing their children to run wild.
5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.
Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.

Lesson 3
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...
1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)
2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.
3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.
4. Set the alarm for 3AM.
5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.
7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)
Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

Lesson 4
Can you stand the mess children make? T o find out...
1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.
2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.
4. Then rub them on the clean walls.
5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.
6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?

Lesson 5
Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.
1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.
2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.
Time allowed for this - all morning.

Lesson 6
Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that.
1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment.
Leave it there.
2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.
3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.
4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

Lesson 7
Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Lesson 8
1. Hollow out a melon.
2. Make a small hole in the side.
3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.
4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.
5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.
6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.
You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.

Lesson 9
Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you're thinking What's 'Noggin'?) Exactly the point.

Lesson 10
Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Lesson 11
Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

This is all very tongue in cheek; anyone who is parent will say 'it's all worth it!' Share it with your friends, both those who do and don't have kids. I guarantee they'll get a chuckle out of it. Remember, a sense of humor is one of the most important things you'll need when you become a parent!