Everybody has a dream

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Dream job went through a few phases. Writing books, writing kids books, journalism, political journalism/editorials. I found out that I just can't finish a long book nor write a story without filling it with complex words, nor can I leave my morals at the door and become a journalist of any kind.

I'd have to say, however, that most of my dreams came true, much to my surprise. No one really expects to find the love of their life at 18. Nor find a profession that they really love doing.

To tell the truth, my biggest dream as a kid was to have disposable income, something my family didn't have. To be able to see a movie or buy ice cream whenever I want, without guilt. I feel so blessed to be able to eat at nice restaurants. Seriously.

I'm hard pressed to come up with dreams that didn't come true that really disappoint me. There's still time, right? I could still publish a work of some kind, I guess.

[€uroMeinke]

I’ve had a few dreams I’ve had to abandon and then retrieve.

I’ve always valued creativity, and growing up I was certain I would end up doing something creative. I was an avid reader, so words was my presumed medium. In college I majored in Philosophy, as I presumed this would spawn great ideas to transform and illustrate through fiction, as Camus or Sartre did. In College I also entertained the dream that my day job would be in academia, as a philosophy professor no doubt.

But I never made it to grad school to pursue my academic dreams. I ran out of money and my family had none to pitch in, my college transcripts held until I paid up my balance of the tuition.

So, I went home, got a temp job that eventually got me into a permanent job in the company I still work for today. One of the last generations of career employees, or so the demographers say. I’ll have been here 20 years come April. I never dreamed this is where I’d be.

Now I enjoy my work well enough, I’m well regarded and respected by people throughout the organizations. They all say hi to me as I walk down the halls and that always makes me smile. But I made a mistake, when I decided to make this my manufactured dream.

In an insane application of reverse midlife crisis, I resolved to immerse myself in my profession and excel in it, since that’s where I happened to be anyway. The people while nice, are nowhere near the type of folks I want to hang out with. I was bored, frustrated, and more annoyed than ever with this people who committed no sin, other than to be themselves. Despite my rather dull journey into management, I still long for the creative life.

Alas, I’ve come to realize that I honestly don’t have the drive, and perseverance to be successful in the creative world. I’ve seem friends suffer through long hardship in its pursuit, that I would never have endured. And now, those that stuck it out are doing quite well. I admire them more for that.

But at least now, I’ve helped create this site where I can dabble and play with words again, offer tidbits of armchair philosophizing, with a garnish of dream interpretation, and I’m quite satisfied with things. My other dreams of travel and satisfying an unending curiosity are also being addressed in a way I seldom acknowledge until I’m force to think about it.

My dreams didn’t play out like I thought they would back in High School, but they’ve continued to guide me through out my life and actually are what bring value and meaning into my life. It took me 40 years to figure that out, but it’s nice to know I can still learn things.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Originally Posted by €uroMeinke

Alas, I’ve come to realize that I honestly don’t have the drive, and perseverance to be successful in the creative world.

Hear, hear! This is why "writer of poetry" never made it onto my dream job list. I don't have the commitment to starve until I could make money off of art.

I think my lack of drive also shows in my inability to finish long works. I get frustrated easily.

[Tref]

"Everybody is where they want to be"
Peter Tork

I am more or less where I want to be, or where I thought I might be. I am still reaching toward the same goals as I was when I was ten, except now I have refined them so as to be more realistic. When I was a tot I wanted to live Charles Chaplins life, unfortunately, Charlie Chaplin all ready lived it. Short of being a success in the silent movie business, my goals have been quite modest; a few friends, somebody who loves me, a decent job, my own place, a few animals, etc.

[SacTown Chronic]

Originally Posted by Cadaverous Pallor

To tell the truth, my biggest dream as a kid was to have disposable income, something my family didn't have. To be able to see a movie or buy ice cream whenever I want, without guilt. I feel so blessed to be able to eat at nice restaurants. Seriously.

I feel ya. We weren't exactly poor when I was young but with five kids to feed and outfit, there never seemed to be much money left over to spend on fun stuff. Then after the divorce, when it was just me and my dad, we really were poor for a while.


Though I have considerably more money than my parents did when I was a kid, I have found that a lot of the fun stuff is free. Nature hikes with the kids, driving around the many delta roads up here just checking out the river, playing basketball in the driveway, spanking my monkey. Fun, fun stuff. Staying busy without using money allows us to spend our cash on the real important things -- like trips to Disneyland. And, oh yeah, being able to eat out at nice restaurants is a priviledge I'll always appreciate, no matter how much money I might have.