Gender & Culture

[Gemini Cricket]

I don't know if you could use this or if it even applies, but I've been thinking often about something.
I noticed that a lot of the men I have met who have issues with gays are also the men who have problems with women in general. They seem to be disturbed not so much that a man is sleeping with another man, but that the gay man is thinking, acting and (sometimes) looking like a woman. Like being like a woman is a bad thing. Like if a woman is dressing in men's clothes it's okay because she's trying to look like a man, but if a man was to wear a dress it's disturbing to them.

It's like the beginning of that Madonna song "What it Feels Like for a Girl" the song starts off with a quote:

Girls can wear jeans
And cut their hair short
Wear shirts and boots
cause its ok to be a boy
But for a boy to look like a girl is degrading
cause you think that being a girl is degrading
But secretly you'd love to know what its like
Wouldn't you?

I don't know if these men I am thinking about actually were curious about themselves, but the issue of men thinking that being a woman is degrading is a valid one...

Like how some straight men are okay with lesbians because they (lesbians) may act more manly and are physically attracted to what straight men area attracted to... But gay men? Not so much.

[alphabassettgrrl]

Originally Posted by Gemini Cricket

I noticed that a lot of the men I have met who have issues with gays are also the men who have problems with women in general. They seem to be disturbed not so much that a man is sleeping with another man, but that the gay man is thinking, acting and (sometimes) looking like a woman. Like being like a woman is a bad thing.

In our masculine culture, the feminine *is* degraded, and degrading. Insults like "you throw like a girl", when all untrained children throw like "girls". Dads start very early to teach their sons to throw properly, to the point that it seems like the kid's a "natural". Images of strength are all male. Success? Male, money, power.

Female is seen as weak, whining, dysfunctional. If that were true, nobody would want to be a girl.

Makes me sad. I think being a girl is a wonderful thing. I'm sure the men in the group are just as happy to be guys. That's fine, too. I just dislike promoting one over the other.