Dove Contest - Take 1 (Need Feedback ASAP!!)

innerSpaceman · 01-03-2008, 07:59 AM

Sorry, it won't play for me either.

Snowflake · 01-03-2008, 08:01 AM

Me either cause I'm at work. Tonight, however, when it's too late!

Alex · 01-03-2008, 08:10 AM

I hate to say it if it was performed just for that but the music doesn't seem to fit right, to me. It might just be that it is a bit too loud but it felt very male for a very feminine scene.

And I agree that there's something just a tad off in the "applying soap to loofah bit.

But otherwise a very good effort.

Gemini Cricket · 01-03-2008, 08:58 AM

A couple of things:

The Dove bottle needs to be facing the camera. Flat. Not at an angle. We need to see all of the front of the bottle.

Jenn's hair later on in the commercial needs to look better than the first shot. I think her hair looked better in the before-Dove section. The whole before and after thing...

I like the shot at the end. But, and this isn't meaning to offend anyone, what is the actress doing in that last shot? It needs to be more clear. If she's using Dove and all is well, she should be lathering her shoulder or arms up and we should see it. Right now, it looks like she's... well... just rubbing herself.

The music maybe should play up the whole Paris motif? Squeaky accordion music at first and then a more sensual Piaf-like sound towards the end?

Is Jenn in Paris? It looks like it.

The graphic next to Jenn in the shower with the Dove bottle should be smoother, again more sensual.

I like the shower squeak at the beginning.

I love the way the bathroom looked.

I love Jenn.

I think this is a cool commercial.

01-03-2008, 07:59 AM	#1
innerSpaceman Kink of Swank Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Inner Space Posts: 13,075	Sorry, it won't play for me either.
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01-03-2008, 08:01 AM	#2
Snowflake lost in the fog Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: San Francisco Posts: 7,831	Me either cause I'm at work. Tonight, however, when it's too late! __________________ Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. - Oscar Wilde
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01-03-2008, 08:10 AM	#3
Alex . Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 13,354	I hate to say it if it was performed just for that but the music doesn't seem to fit right, to me. It might just be that it is a bit too loud but it felt very male for a very feminine scene. And I agree that there's something just a tad off in the "applying soap to loofah bit. But otherwise a very good effort.
	Submit to Quotes

01-03-2008, 08:58 AM	#4
Gemini Cricket ... Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 13,244	A couple of things: The Dove bottle needs to be facing the camera. Flat. Not at an angle. We need to see all of the front of the bottle. Jenn's hair later on in the commercial needs to look better than the first shot. I think her hair looked better in the before-Dove section. The whole before and after thing... I like the shot at the end. But, and this isn't meaning to offend anyone, what is the actress doing in that last shot? It needs to be more clear. If she's using Dove and all is well, she should be lathering her shoulder or arms up and we should see it. Right now, it looks like she's... well... just rubbing herself. The music maybe should play up the whole Paris motif? Squeaky accordion music at first and then a more sensual Piaf-like sound towards the end? Is Jenn in Paris? It looks like it. The graphic next to Jenn in the shower with the Dove bottle should be smoother, again more sensual. I like the shower squeak at the beginning. I love the way the bathroom looked. I love Jenn. I think this is a cool commercial.
	Submit to Quotes