The Un-Interview

SacTown Chronic · 04-08-2005, 12:27 PM

I read somewhere that sauerkraut flavored applesauce is your favorite....where in the world did you find such an item?

At a Wal-Mart in Germany.

Have you ever considered rubbing applesauce on your body?

Please. I refuse to sink to your level in order to answer that.

So you are telling me that you've never smeared applesauce on yourself?

I thought about it, but then I thought better.

Uh, what is that on your nipples?

Applesauce.

Can I lick it off?

I'd say that would be unwise.

Have you ever put banana flavored applesauce on yourself?

I did that once. The monkey didn't like it.

So, why did you fly all the way to Germany just for applesauce?

I couldn't live without it.

When you arrived back in the States with your applesauce, you gouged out the eyes of the customs agent who tried to confiscate it. Why?

What else could I have done? If you were in that situation, you'd do it too.

blueerica · 04-08-2005, 12:54 PM

Where did you meet your current beau? I understand that when you met him, he was working retail.

At a Wall-Mart in Germany.

What did you do to catch his eye? How did he catch yours?

Please. I refuse to sink to your level in order to answer that.

Why won’t you answer me?

I thought about it, but then I thought better.

OK, so let’s change the subject, what’s your favorite food?

Applesauce.

Mind if I ask if you've done anything with applesauce, other than eat it?

I'd say that would be unwise.

Come on, you’ve had to try something fun with it…

I did that once. The monkey didn't like it.

So that probably puts you in great need of the Scooper, right?

I couldn't live without it.

Last week, you fired your agent, your manager, your publicist, and your mother, all apparently over some scuffle involving a Mars bar & half a can of 7up. Why did you do it?

What else could I have done? If you were in that situation, you'd do it too.

04-08-2005, 12:27 PM	#1
SacTown Chronic the myth of the dream Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 2,217	I read somewhere that sauerkraut flavored applesauce is your favorite....where in the world did you find such an item? At a Wal-Mart in Germany. Have you ever considered rubbing applesauce on your body? Please. I refuse to sink to your level in order to answer that. So you are telling me that you've never smeared applesauce on yourself? I thought about it, but then I thought better. Uh, what is that on your nipples? Applesauce. Can I lick it off? I'd say that would be unwise. Have you ever put banana flavored applesauce on yourself? I did that once. The monkey didn't like it. So, why did you fly all the way to Germany just for applesauce? I couldn't live without it. When you arrived back in the States with your applesauce, you gouged out the eyes of the customs agent who tried to confiscate it. Why? What else could I have done? If you were in that situation, you'd do it too. __________________ Is it the fingers, or the brain that you're teaching a lesson?
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04-08-2005, 12:54 PM	#2
blueerica Nueve Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 6,497	Where did you meet your current beau? I understand that when you met him, he was working retail. At a Wall-Mart in Germany. What did you do to catch his eye? How did he catch yours? Please. I refuse to sink to your level in order to answer that. Why won’t you answer me? I thought about it, but then I thought better. OK, so let’s change the subject, what’s your favorite food? Applesauce. Mind if I ask if you've done anything with applesauce, other than eat it? I'd say that would be unwise. Come on, you’ve had to try something fun with it… I did that once. The monkey didn't like it. So that probably puts you in great need of the Scooper, right? I couldn't live without it. Last week, you fired your agent, your manager, your publicist, and your mother, all apparently over some scuffle involving a Mars bar & half a can of 7up. Why did you do it? What else could I have done? If you were in that situation, you'd do it too.
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