“Hello, friend, it’s me, CRAZY! Yeah, CRAZY! So good to hear your voice.”

Ghoulish Delight · 04-21-2005, 01:11 PM

I've got a friend, I'm ALWAYS catching her being crazy. Whether it's nonsense conversations with her dog, some bizarre noise combined with equally bizarre facial expression in reaction to something, or random conversation with herself, I catch her every time even if it's just for a millisecond. It's hillarious.

Although the best story with this friend happened at a bar. Totally not her fault, entirely my doing, and we both looked insane. We were seated at a table, and I dropped something, probably a napkin. As I reached down to pick it up, she noticed me pause for a second and come back up with a puzzled look on my face. She asked what was up and I responded that it smelled like armpit under the table. I then began the process of convincing her to join me for a sniff to confirm. She reluctantly agreed, so we both ducked our heads back down and began sniffing, comfirming with nods beneath the table top that it did indeed smell of BO. So we both return to our full upright seated positions...only to find the waiter had arrived some moments before with our drinks, and witnessed us sniffing under the table. And then, because I guess she thought this would somehow make us seem LESS crazy, she says to him, "It smells like armpit under there." Great.

Claire · 04-21-2005, 01:34 PM

I've taken to sighing audibly lately. I hope it's a habit I break. SOON. My grandma does it! It's almost a compulsion now....I feel the need to sigh....audibly...right now!!! Crap!!!

Eliza, the town with the Doll Lady is McMinnville, OR. The same town boasts Superman/Spiderman and the Box Guy. Craziness!!! The funny thing is that before I met my husband (he's from there) I lived with someone from that town so I already knew of the town crazies. I used to be the sort of person who approached them and would buy them coffee.....and ask them questions. I talked to Doll Lady in Wal*Mart once, but she doesn't make sense, no complete sentences out of her. Superman wouldn't even look at me. And I've never seen Box Guy, but I've looked in his front window....all boxes, in a gorgeously delicate Victorian style house.

Martha, the witch, I talked to her once and bought her coffee at Mini-Mart when I was 19sh and it turned out she was related to a girl I went to school with...her aunt....but the girl never spoke up and told anyone. I felt really bad. For both of them.

I forgot about Bottle Can Clyde! He lived in the town where I went to high school....homelessish for years (he most likely had a house, never saw him sleep on the streets), then suddenly quit drinking and got a job at a grocery store (proximity to cans and bottles, I wonder?). He mumbled, cussed at cars, and wandered, picking up cans in ditches for at least years that I know of, before he suddenly went respectable. Weirdest thing!! And the funny thing.....his name isn't actually Clyde, but I can't remember what it is.

Gosh, I feel like wandering downtown to talk to the guy who pees in broad daylight (seen him do it now twice at my busstop) and the flashing lady with the saggy ass tits OR the guy who wears the white collar and claims to be from the Church of Venus......or the guy in the wheelchair who refuses to push it with his hands, so he scoots it with his feet, unless he can't make it up a curb, so he gets out and pushes it up the curb......I love that guy!

LSPoorEeyorick · 04-21-2005, 01:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claire

...and the flashing lady with the saggy ass tits...

I'm sorry, Claire, but you're just going to have to better parse that expression for me.

Does her ass resemble sagging tits?
Do her tits resemble sagging ass?
Are her tits and ass both participating in the sagging action?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Claire · 04-21-2005, 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LSPoorEeyorick

Does her ass resemble sagging tits?

Yes

Quote:

Do her tits resemble sagging ass?

Yes

Quote:

Are her tits and ass both participating in the sagging action?

Most definitely! She's a treat.

She's like a picture from National Geographic come to life in downtown Portland. Nipples the size of pancakes, too!

alphabassettgrrl · 04-21-2005, 05:44 PM

I guess sign me up for crazy-ville: I talk to myself, I talk to inanimate objects, I talk to animals, I talk to whatever. I say hello to the sun and sky. I bid my car a good-night when she gets me home safely.

Not so much that there is a point to the conversations; just I talk to things. When I was a kid I used to practice saying all those things that you can't say; I'd hold imaginary conversations with my mother and say all the things I wanted. But then we'd have it for real, and of course I can't even say the things I need to say. I'm a dork.

Yes, I sing in the car. No, I don't care what people think.

wendybeth · 04-21-2005, 09:28 PM

Tori talks as she plays- always has. After she lost her hearing, we enrolled her in the deaf preschool, and her teacher was amazed by how animatedly she would converse with herself/toys/imaginary friends. (She was used to seeing children who were born deaf or lost hearing pre-speech, and Tori was one of the few hard of hearing students). The other kids would stare at her like she was from another planet. Of course, they were busily signing to their toys- as if toys know ASL.

(

)

She is nearly ten, and she still does it. I don't know if I should be concerned- I like the fact that her imagination is so strong, but maybe it means she takes after Auntie Colleen......

Eliza Hodgkins 1812 · 04-21-2005, 01:37 PM

GD, that's exactly the kind of bar interaction my friend Alli and I had all the time in NYC.

I love those kinds of bar interactions. LOL.

Ghoulish Delight · 04-21-2005, 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eliza Hodgkins 1812

GD, that's exactly the kind of bar interaction my friend Alli and I had all the time in NYC.

I love those kinds of bar interactions. LOL.

Sadly, notice in my story that it all happened before the drinks came...

Eliza Hodgkins 1812 · 04-21-2005, 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ghoulish Delight

Sadly, notice in my story that it all happened before the drinks came...

Oh, I noticed.

Claire · 04-21-2005, 01:53 PM

Oh gosh, I practice monologues....dramatic ones....facially. But I don't think I've ever gone audible with them. I even have theme music going.....

Speaking of my theme music monologues.....I've always pictures myself in a movie, especially the opening credits.....my face going by in the window of a bus heading out somewhere in the middle of corn fields. When I was little, the bus was heading to camp where I would fall for an older camp counselor or I'd make a bet with my worst enemy at camp that I'd lose my virginity first or I'd cut off the back of her dress and then find out she was my twin sister. Then, when I got older, I imagined I was on that bus heading to college....then later, it wasn't a bus window, but a car window and I was breaking up with my boyfriend. But always there was some dramatic voice-over done by me, with some song in the background. Something by Bread or The Police or Captain and Tennille. And it's the voiceovers I think I practiced facially, but never audibly.

So far. I'm sure I'll go vocal someday.

04-21-2005, 01:11 PM	#1
Ghoulish Delight I Floop the Pig Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Alternative Swankstyle Posts: 19,348	I've got a friend, I'm ALWAYS catching her being crazy. Whether it's nonsense conversations with her dog, some bizarre noise combined with equally bizarre facial expression in reaction to something, or random conversation with herself, I catch her every time even if it's just for a millisecond. It's hillarious. Although the best story with this friend happened at a bar. Totally not her fault, entirely my doing, and we both looked insane. We were seated at a table, and I dropped something, probably a napkin. As I reached down to pick it up, she noticed me pause for a second and come back up with a puzzled look on my face. She asked what was up and I responded that it smelled like armpit under the table. I then began the process of convincing her to join me for a sniff to confirm. She reluctantly agreed, so we both ducked our heads back down and began sniffing, comfirming with nods beneath the table top that it did indeed smell of BO. So we both return to our full upright seated positions...only to find the waiter had arrived some moments before with our drinks, and witnessed us sniffing under the table. And then, because I guess she thought this would somehow make us seem LESS crazy, she says to him, "It smells like armpit under there." Great. __________________ 'He who receives an idea from me, receives instruction himself without lessening mine; as he who lights his taper at mine, receives light without darkening me.' -TJ
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04-21-2005, 01:34 PM	#2
Claire Shagilicious Disneyland!! Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Fulfilling my destiny..... Posts: 740	I've taken to sighing audibly lately. I hope it's a habit I break. SOON. My grandma does it! It's almost a compulsion now....I feel the need to sigh....audibly...right now!!! Crap!!! Eliza, the town with the Doll Lady is McMinnville, OR. The same town boasts Superman/Spiderman and the Box Guy. Craziness!!! The funny thing is that before I met my husband (he's from there) I lived with someone from that town so I already knew of the town crazies. I used to be the sort of person who approached them and would buy them coffee.....and ask them questions. I talked to Doll Lady in WalMart once, but she doesn't make sense, no complete sentences out of her. Superman wouldn't even look at me. And I've never seen Box Guy, but I've looked in his front window....all boxes, in a gorgeously delicate Victorian style house. Martha, the witch, I talked to her once and bought her coffee at Mini-Mart when I was 19sh and it turned out she was related to a girl I went to school with...her aunt....but the girl never spoke up and told anyone. I felt really bad. For both of them. I forgot about Bottle Can Clyde! He lived in the town where I went to high school....homelessish for years (he most likely had a house, never saw him sleep on the streets), then suddenly quit drinking and got a job at a grocery store (proximity to cans and bottles, I wonder?). He mumbled, cussed at cars, and wandered, picking up cans in ditches for at least years that I know of, before he suddenly went respectable. Weirdest thing!! And the funny thing.....his name isn't actually Clyde, but I can't remember what it is. Gosh, I feel like wandering downtown to talk to the guy who pees in broad daylight (seen him do it now twice at my busstop) and the flashing lady with the saggy ass tits OR the guy who wears the white collar and claims to be from the Church of Venus......or the guy in the wheelchair who refuses to push it with his hands, so he scoots it with his feet, unless he can't make it up a curb, so he gets out and pushes it up the curb......I love that guy! __________________ Miles:* It tastes like the back of a fing L.A. school bus. Now they probably didn't de-stem, hoping for some semblance of concentration, crushed it up with leaves and mice, and then wound up with this rancid tar and turpentine bull**. Fin' Raid. Jack: Tastes pretty good to me.
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04-21-2005, 05:44 PM	#5
alphabassettgrrl Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 4,978	I guess sign me up for crazy-ville: I talk to myself, I talk to inanimate objects, I talk to animals, I talk to whatever. I say hello to the sun and sky. I bid my car a good-night when she gets me home safely. Not so much that there is a point to the conversations; just I talk to things. When I was a kid I used to practice saying all those things that you can't say; I'd hold imaginary conversations with my mother and say all the things I wanted. But then we'd have it for real, and of course I can't even say the things I need to say. I'm a dork. Yes, I sing in the car. No, I don't care what people think.
	Submit to Quotes

04-21-2005, 09:28 PM	#6
wendybeth Nevermind Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 7,847	Tori talks as she plays- always has. After she lost her hearing, we enrolled her in the deaf preschool, and her teacher was amazed by how animatedly she would converse with herself/toys/imaginary friends. (She was used to seeing children who were born deaf or lost hearing pre-speech, and Tori was one of the few hard of hearing students). The other kids would stare at her like she was from another planet. Of course, they were busily signing to their toys- as if toys know ASL. ( ) She is nearly ten, and she still does it. I don't know if I should be concerned- I like the fact that her imagination is so strong, but maybe it means she takes after Auntie Colleen...... __________________
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04-21-2005, 01:37 PM	#7
Eliza Hodgkins 1812 Sputnik Sweetheart Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Long Beach Posts: 2,685	GD, that's exactly the kind of bar interaction my friend Alli and I had all the time in NYC. I love those kinds of bar interactions. LOL.
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04-21-2005, 01:53 PM	#10
Claire Shagilicious Disneyland!! Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Fulfilling my destiny..... Posts: 740	Oh gosh, I practice monologues....dramatic ones....facially. But I don't think I've ever gone audible with them. I even have theme music going..... Speaking of my theme music monologues.....I've always pictures myself in a movie, especially the opening credits.....my face going by in the window of a bus heading out somewhere in the middle of corn fields. When I was little, the bus was heading to camp where I would fall for an older camp counselor or I'd make a bet with my worst enemy at camp that I'd lose my virginity first or I'd cut off the back of her dress and then find out she was my twin sister. Then, when I got older, I imagined I was on that bus heading to college....then later, it wasn't a bus window, but a car window and I was breaking up with my boyfriend. But always there was some dramatic voice-over done by me, with some song in the background. Something by Bread or The Police or Captain and Tennille. And it's the voiceovers I think I practiced facially, but never audibly. So far. I'm sure I'll go vocal someday. __________________ Miles: It tastes like the back of a fing L.A. school bus. Now they probably didn't de-stem, hoping for some semblance of concentration, crushed it up with leaves and mice, and then wound up with this rancid tar and turpentine bull**. Fin' Raid. Jack: Tastes pretty good to me.
	Submit to Quotes