Your first boyfriend or girlfriend

flippyshark · 10-13-2008, 08:22 AM

I had my first "make out" session with a girl friend when I was twelve. (It was a ridiculous and giggly event). I didn't cross home plate until I was 16.

I don't have kids, but I admit, if I were a dad and had daughters, I would be more than grumpy about my thirteen year old having a serious boyfriend. (If it IS serious, which I consider red-flagged by the boy's eagerness to talk to her Dad about it. That sounds like me when I was a sophomore. I was VERY serious about my high school romances, hence, I know that this can be a very bad thing!)

Wow, I am glad I don't have teenagers.

3894 · 10-13-2008, 08:28 AM

Betty, this is your husband's child, too. If he feels something strongly, that should be respected. I'm just basing this on what you said in your post since we don't know each other.

Every house has its own rules. Our two daughters had to put up with No Dating until You're 16. From 14 to 16, they could go out in mixed groups.

Period. No exceptions. Childhood is short enough.

Betty · 10-13-2008, 09:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 3894

Betty, this is your husband's child, too. If he feels something strongly, that should be respected. I'm just basing this on what you said in your post since we don't know each other.

Every house has its own rules. Our two daughters had to put up with No Dating until You're 16. From 14 to 16, they could go out in mixed groups.

Period. No exceptions. Childhood is short enough.

I tend to agree with this overall. I think it's a good guideline. Going out in groups - and with parental supervision on top of that depending on the circumstances.

I'm curious though - does your "no dating" rule mean no boyfriend - or was a boyfriend fine but they just couldn't be alone together.

Also - if they went out as a mixed group, how could you be sure they weren't just saying that upfront and then not getting some alone time in?

3894 · 10-13-2008, 10:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Betty

I'm curious though - does your "no dating" rule mean no boyfriend - or was a boyfriend fine but they just couldn't be alone together.

No exclusive relationships, even if going together in a group setting, is probably the best way to put it. We also were really happy to drive the group of kids to the movies or the skating rink or whatever they were going to do.

Quote:

Also - if they went out as a mixed group, how could you be sure they weren't just saying that upfront and then not getting some alone time in?

You can't be sure. We did pay attention to who our daughters were IMing with or talking on the phone with. We also reinforced how this was the time to meet many kids.

The #1 thing with teens is to give them your time. Let them know you are keeping tabs on them - not spying or prying but keeping tabs. Teens want you less than younger children but they need you even more.

Good luck on your decisions, all parents of teens out there!

10-13-2008, 08:28 AM	#2
3894 Next Stop: Funkytown! Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Cheeselandia Posts: 1,907	Betty, this is your husband's child, too. If he feels something strongly, that should be respected. I'm just basing this on what you said in your post since we don't know each other. Every house has its own rules. Our two daughters had to put up with No Dating until You're 16. From 14 to 16, they could go out in mixed groups. Period. No exceptions. Childhood is short enough. __________________ "I didn't want to have to do this, but you leave me no choice. Here comes the smolder." - Flynn Rider, "Tangled"
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10-13-2008, 08:22 AM	#1
flippyshark Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Orlando, FL Posts: 2,852	I had my first "make out" session with a girl friend when I was twelve. (It was a ridiculous and giggly event). I didn't cross home plate until I was 16. I don't have kids, but I admit, if I were a dad and had daughters, I would be more than grumpy about my thirteen year old having a serious boyfriend. (If it IS serious, which I consider red-flagged by the boy's eagerness to talk to her Dad about it. That sounds like me when I was a sophomore. I was VERY serious about my high school romances, hence, I know that this can be a very bad thing!) Wow, I am glad I don't have teenagers.
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