The First Thing You'd Do if You Were President

[CoasterMatt]

I'd hire the Gravity Group to build an exact replica of the Long Beach Cyclone Racer at Camp David - and require any visiting dignitaries to ride in the back row before any negotiations.

[CoasterMatt]

Oh yeah, I'd also PAINT THE WHITE HOUSE BLACK!!

[Scrooge McSam]

Originally Posted by scaeagles

I'd allow the average US taxpayer to opt out of Social Security, just as members of the House and Senate can do.

Could you please cite a source to back up this opinion.

It is my understanding that Congress cannot opt out of the Social Security program. They pay FICA just like every other working (don't get me started!) American. There was a period of about 20 years that municipalities could opt out of social security, but that loophole was closed in 1983. They do, however, have retirement security options not available to all Americans, like the Thrift Savings Plan which is similar to 401K plans offered by larger employers.

[scaeagles]

My bad, Scrooge. They were required to start paying in beginning in 1988. Previously to that they were permitted to opt out. Behind the times a bit, I suppose.

That being said, I would still, in a graduated fashion, allow the average US citizen to opt out of social security, moving in the direction of private accounts.

[Prudence]

I'm not an economist or a US historian. My perceptions are based on my corner of the world and might not hold everywhere. Nonetheless, here they are.

I'm not sure how I will approach this problem, but in my opinion the number one problem facing this country at the moment is the lack of long-term planning.

My ancestors, at least on one side, were farmers. One set of great-grandparents came over from Switzerland and settled in the midwest -- farmers. Another set were also midwest farmers. My grandparents were farmers. (And they took it seriously. My grandfather had a master's degree in Agronomy from Iowa State, 1933. That was a Big Deal at the time. It was a hard science. He picked his farm after taking and analyzing soil samples from across Iowa. And he knew what he was doing. But now I'm just bragging.)

My dad and aunt grew up on a working farm. And it still influences how they act and plan today. There's a lot of chance in farming. Diseases, pests, weather -- all can destroy a crop season or your animal stock. And they happen regularly. You have to have a plan for what will happen if this season doesn't turn out as planned -- how will you salvage what you can? Do you have seed stock for next year?

There's a cyclical nature to farming, and you have to keep the next several cycles in mind. Even maufacturing is cyclical to some extent, although a shorter cycle from beginning to finished product. But agriculture isn't our backbone any more, and manufacturing's headed the same way. They say we're moving toward a "service" economy. But the service "cycle" can be very short indeed. It's a different way of viewing business and, by extension, life.

We hear all the time about our nation of debt. People don't save for retirement. Hell, they don't save for next month. We've sped up our internal clocks and our expectations are different. We expect results now, not next year, not in five years. From Eisner-era Disney to Enron to healthcare HMOs, we want our portfolios to go up month after month and those demands have been commuicated to the top. We're not willing to see short-term "losses" (some might call them investments...) designed to ensure long-term gain.

The Depression was a major economic event for this country -- but the lasting effects on people vary. Some people vowed to make sure nothing like that ever happened to them again -- and increased their long-term planning. Others decided they'd better get what they could WHEN they could, because who knows what's going to happen tomorrow. And that's the view that seems to predominate today.

Again, I only have my own experience and obervations to draw on, but even growing up there was a big difference between my parents and my classmates parents. We were definitely not poor. Probably upper middle class. We probably had more income than a lot of my classmates. But my parents have saved, invested, paid off their mortgage after 15 years, put two kids through four-year degrees, etc... We didn't have the shiniest or the newest, but when my dad was sick we didn't have to worry. I am so very lucky that I don't have to worry about my parents' long-term care needs; they've planned for that, including all the "what-ifs" my paranoid father can imagine.

My classmates, on the other hand, had shiny new cars, designer clothes, huge houses, and enormous debt. And who cares, because if the debt gets too big they'll just declare bankruptcy and start over.

To draw from the discussion here re: cars -- people don't make long-term decisions. They want instant gratification -- the biggest, cheapest, flashiest car they can buy. There are many ways in which capitalism is great. Playing to the lowest common denominator isn't one of them. Given the choice between two automobiles -- one more expensive, but using "responsible" fuel sources, and one dirt cheap but belching black smoke -- there are a whole lot of people who figure someone else will do the responsible thing, but they need a car and they need it cheap and their one smoke-belching car isn't a big deal, so who cares?

And the answer isn't for the government to make decisions for people. That's what frustrates me. I don't want to be told what to do and I don't want to tell other people to do. But at the same time, I can't make people care about anything past the end of their nose, much less the end of their anticipated lifetime.

Hell, if I could even make people think TO the end of their anticipated lifetime it would be a miracle. I think that's the biggest problem with social security. People currently receiving it may have made plans based on it. People my age haven't the foggiest idea what they'll need at the end of life. How can you have a national discussion on something when most don't even understand what they're discussing?

And there's my lack of helpful input. I don't know how to fix it. And everything about today's culture and technology only decreases our attention spans. Fortunately I have years ahead of me before I can even run.

[Tref]

My first act as President - record an album of Salsa hits - tour.

2nd act: Vice President Nelly

3rd act: remove power from U.S. Treasury and give it to Franklin Mint

4th act: Change National symbol from eagle to Gn2Dlnd's "popeye" avator photo

Intermission (refreshments will be served in lobby)

5th act: invite Hannity & Colmes to dinner - serve hemlock

6th act: change National anthem to theme from Love, American, Style
Curtain

Spoiler:

this box keep words FRESH

7th act: Here is one promise I'll make and boss Jim Gettys knows I'll keep it: My first official act as President of this country will be to appoint a special district attorney to arrange for the indictment, prosecution and conviction of Boss Jim W. Gettys!

8th act: Less talk, more rock!

[wendybeth]

Coastermatt and the BellCaptain almost had my vote, but I think I'll have to go with Tref. Mainly for the hemlock idea, but also for the intermission. This country could use it.

Can we still paint the WH black, though?

[Not Afraid]

I'd redecorate the White House in the style of the Haunted Mansion complete with a "terrorists be damned" doombuggy ride thru. All major decisions would be made by Mdm. Leota and, those who disagreed, would be sent down the river and auctioned off to those most needing an extra breadwinner in their family.

[Motorboat Cruiser]

Originally Posted by Tref

5th act: invite Hannity & Colmes to dinner - serve hemlock

Perfect.

Although, it should be Hannity and Colmes.

[Matterhorn Fan]

Originally Posted by HTHBellcaptain

Next thing I'd do is get rid of the U.S. Mint, and replace it with the U.S. Chocolate Mint. That's right, the new currency for my bellhop dictatorship would be Chocolate.

The final thing that I would do on day 1 of being President/Dictator/Bellcaptain would be to shoot Carrot Top.

Oooh! Ooh! Can I be your Vice President/Dictator/Bellcaptain? I promise I won't eat up your entire fortune of chocolate. Just half of it--I'll share, I swear.

Garden gnomes in the shower? Riiiiight.