Stoat Art !! - Page 7

LashStoat · 01-05-2009, 05:55 AM

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...and a toasted sandwich made from one:
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LashStoat · 01-05-2009, 06:01 AM

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This is a compliant sample of a BBQ/Fireplace for the newly-introduced Californian Fire Regulations. You will no doubt be aware that it all comes down to brick count now, irregardless [sic] of fuel type.

You can build one as close to any other structure as you like. If you dare.

Pictured is a 1 (one) Family 12,792 brick-count structure (and we will be counting):
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LashStoat · 01-05-2009, 06:19 AM

Did I ever tell you that when Bear and I stayed in San Diego, there was a sign in the room saying that "Candles and matches would be confiscated *" ?

That night, and true to their word, the maid took our prayer candles and our matches. Hotel Management saw to it that they were properly disposed of...well almost...they set fire to the basement and we had to leave the building, which was virtually pitch black. No bastard could see a thing.

If only we had our candles...or a 12,792 brick regulation fireplace to light the way.

*This bit is true.

CoasterMatt · 01-05-2009, 06:45 AM

What about roman candles and signal flares?

LashStoat · 01-05-2009, 06:54 AM

LashStoat · 01-05-2009, 07:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CoasterMatt

What about roman candles and signal flares?

Dear CoasterMatt,

No, the sign did not mention Roman Candles or Flares. However, they did not take my Roman Candles, Charles Manson meditation tapes, the pigs blood or indeed my 1970's pair of flares (though deep down I wish that they had).

75 days and counting dude...

Hugs from the Stoat.

LashStoat · 01-05-2009, 07:36 AM

lashbear · 01-05-2009, 12:33 PM

Stoat, you're creative when you can't sleep !

LashStoat · 01-19-2009, 05:12 PM

Following a request from her Uncle Lashbear, SusieAnne Krellingshaw, aged 12.5 from Arkansas, currently studying Food Technology at the Arkansas Heights lower junior school has developed a kilt made entirely from bacon.

Here we see Uncle Lashbear modelling the new kilt. When asked what he thought of his niece's design, Lashbear said:

"It's a truly innovative design. I got hungry on the way to this photo shoot, and all I had to do was tear off a bit of the back hem line. The tripe lining prevents the garment from sticking to your legs, and it never needs dry-cleaning...one simply hangs it in a curing cupboard between uses."

SusieAnne, however, is a little more critical of her own design:

"Well", she said, "it does attract flies in summer and wild animals if you go to the park...but the biggest problem is that you constantly slip off your chair".

Undeterred by these problems, SusieAnne has plans to create a poly-cotton printed version of the Kilt, which will come complete with faux-tripe lining and bacon-esther infused scent.
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lashbear · 01-19-2009, 05:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LashStoat

At least I'll never want for lube again !!

View Poll Results: Who wants to see more Stoat Art in Stoats Posts ?
Yes !! Add that Stoaty goodness to your posts, I love it.	14	46.67%
Gimmee Both - I like a mixture of written and non-written humour.	22	73.33%
I prefer humour in written form only.	0	0%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 30. You may not vote on this poll

01-05-2009, 06:19 AM	#63
LashStoat There's a hole in the Bin Liner... Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Merry Old Land of OZ. Posts: 428	Did I ever tell you that when Bear and I stayed in San Diego, there was a sign in the room saying that "*Candles and matches would be confiscated* " ? That night, and true to their word, the maid took our prayer candles and our matches. Hotel Management saw to it that they were properly disposed of...well almost...they set fire to the basement and we had to leave the building, which was virtually pitch black. No bastard could see a thing. If only we had our candles...or a 12,792 brick regulation fireplace to light the way. This bit is true. __________________
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01-05-2009, 06:45 AM	#64
CoasterMatt BRAAAAAAAINS! Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: One Step Beyond... Posts: 8,802	What about roman candles and signal flares? __________________ Do you like my photography? Visit photosbymatt.tumblr.com to purchase prints!
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01-05-2009, 12:33 PM	#68
lashbear SwishBuckling Bear Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: In Isolation :) Posts: 6,597	Stoat, you're creative when you can't sleep ! __________________ *I Heart* my Husband - I can't think of anyone I'd rather be in isolation with.**
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