The Gay Thread

[Ghoulish Delight]

Here's my perspective:

I can't find details, but I'm pretty sure at least one of the recent gay bullying related suicides was by a kid who was not gay, but was subjected to "your gay!" bullsh*t because he fit some gay stereotype or another.

Around these parts I may be butch-by-comparison. But (prepare for the shock of a lfetime), in average American circles I am not the paradigm of hetero-male-machismo. And, for my entire life, because I have the audacity to not spend 100% of my time thinking and talking about tits and pro wrestling, I've had the "gay" label attached to me. Hell, my college roommate who walked in on me and CP while "indisposed" and caught me snooping through his considerable collection of hetero porn, STILL was apparently speculating to everyone else in the dorm that I was gay. Because...I don't know. My voice isn't deep enough? I don't know what to do with my hands while talking? I'm not threatened to spend time with other males who aren't macho enough? Who know, and who gives a sh*t?

So yeah, I'm a little touchy when it comes to the subject of "gaydar" and swishiness.

I'll let y'all fight over whether it fits the dictionary definition of hypocrisy to be passing around "It Gets Better" videos while out of the other side of your mouth you're merrily reinforcing that it's okay to label people based on gay stereotypes. Whatever you want to call it, I don't like it and I'm going to call you on it every time.

[JWBear]

Originally Posted by Alex

The key fact being that I'm right and you're wrong. As long as we can agree on that it'll all be good.

Please tell me that that was an attempt at humor.

Originally Posted by Ghoulish Delight

Here's my perspective:

I can't find details, but I'm pretty sure at least one of the recent gay bullying related suicides was by a kid who was not gay, but was subjected to "your gay!" bullsh*t because he fit some gay stereotype or another.

Around these parts I may be butch-by-comparison. But (prepare for the shock of a lfetime), in average American circles I am not the paradigm of hetero-male-machismo. And, for my entire life, because I have the audacity to not spend 100% of my time thinking and talking about tits and pro wrestling, I've had the "gay" label attached to me. Hell, my college roommate who walked in on me and CP while "indisposed" and caught me snooping through his considerable collection of hetero porn, STILL was apparently speculating to everyone else in the dorm that I was gay. Because...I don't know. My voice isn't deep enough? I don't know what to do with my hands while talking? I'm not threatened to spend time with other males who aren't macho enough? Who know, and who gives a sh*t?

So yeah, I'm a little touchy when it comes to the subject of "gaydar" and swishiness.

I'll let y'all fight over whether it fits the dictionary definition of hypocrisy to be passing around "It Gets Better" videos while out of the other side of your mouth you're merrily reinforcing that it's okay to label people based on gay stereotypes. Whatever you want to call it, I don't like it and I'm going to call you on it every time.

I see where you are coming from, but I still have to disagree with you. It's much more than labeling someone based on stereotypes. And unless you have lived the life of a gay person, it's really not something you can truly grasp. While you have been mistaken for gay, you are a heterosexual male. You simply do not have the life experiences we do, and you can't see the world through the lens of ours. This is true of any minority; there are points of view you just can't comprehend unless you belong to that group.

[Alex]

Originally Posted by JWBear

Please tell me that that was an attempt at humor.

Yes, but with the side benefit of being wrapped around truth. I'm right, you're wrong. If that weren't the case I'd be arguing your side.

there are points of view you just can't comprehend unless you belong to that group.

I can accept that (though I didn't realize that gays had a single monolithic life experience that taught them all the exact same things). I don't accept that it extends to the idea that you can tell with precision worthy of treating as fact--through a TV screen, no less--who is gay.

[JWBear]

Originally Posted by Alex

Yes, but with the side benefit of being wrapped around truth. I'm right, you're wrong. If that weren't the case I'd be arguing your side.

Well... Whatever makes you happy.

[Alex]

Originally Posted by JWBear

Well... Whatever makes you happy.

Exactly, next time if you just remember that if you disagree with me then you are wrong, it will save you a lot of time and effort.

[JWBear]

Originally Posted by Alex

Exactly, next time if you just remember that if you disagree with me then you are wrong, it will save you a lot of time and effort.

You know, there is another word for that.

[Gemini Cricket]

Originally Posted by JWBear

You know, there is another word for that.

Wait. What was the first word?

[Alex]

Originally Posted by JWBear

You know, there is another word for that.

Yes, there is. But not the one you're thinking (it doesn't mean what you think it means).

[Ghoulish Delight]

Originally Posted by JWBear

I see where you are coming from, but I still have to disagree with you. It's much more than labeling someone based on stereotypes. And unless you have lived the life of a gay person, it's really not something you can truly grasp. While you have been mistaken for gay, you are a heterosexual male. You simply do not have the life experiences we do, and you can't see the world through the lens of ours. This is true of any minority; there are points of view you just can't comprehend unless you belong to that group.

You're right...no more than YOU can possibly comprehend what it's like to continually through adolescence have your sexuality wrongly assailed.

I'm Jewish, trust me, I'm well versed in what it's like to be the target of bigotry.

Go ahead and tell Billy Lucas's parents (thanks GC) that, really, Billy shouldn't have been whining, he had no idea what REAL persecution is.

[JWBear]

Originally Posted by Ghoulish Delight

Go ahead and tell Billy Lucas's parents (thanks GC) that, really, Billy shouldn't have been whining, he had no idea what REAL persecution is.

Where did that come from?! That has nothing to do with what I said.