Societal norms, the Moral Majority and a rant that feels so good - Page 9

Where's Barbie? · 11-01-2005, 10:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by €uroMeinke

1) My Quietness in person - Must be bored, snobish, anti-social
Of course, some of the above judgements might be true

You say it

your very quiet in groups but how can you get a word in with big mouth NF or me around. We don't even take a breath when we talk

MickeyLumbo · 11-01-2005, 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kevy Baby

Well THERE'S a story I am looking forward to...

it all started with a brass stripper's pole and a man-thong...

Not Afraid · 11-01-2005, 10:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Where's Barbie?

You say it

your very quiet in groups but how can you get a word in with big mouth NF or me around. We don't even take a breath when we talk

Yes, but if we DID breathe, he wouldn't shut up!

lizziebith · 11-01-2005, 10:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Not Afraid

OMG! That's right! I had forgotten about the losing friends part of that episode of our lives. Oh well, we're happy.

Wow! Lost friends? Sheesh. People should just learn to surf life's waves.

Of course, I think I might have lost a couple of friends after leaving "what looked a whole lot like a perfect marriage" once. Apparently, I'm just an ingrate...

Oh well, at least I'm friends with a few exes...Hi Boss R!

Alex · 11-01-2005, 11:27 PM

Quote:

And it's so interesting how we can all judge Crystal's ex-friend for the crime of having judged Crystal.

I've tried very hard not to judge the former friends. I don't have nearly enough information about the situation to do that. There may very well be information we don't have that would lead me to agree with this person.

I have no opinion on whether her judgment of Crystal is right or wrong (though if it is based purely on bisexuality, then I probably disagree with it but it is a judgment people have the right to make.

Based on the information provided, I would judge the friend's behavior to be rude, needlessly hurtful, and not the right (as I define it) way to handle such things. If she decided that something about Crystal was a problem then she should simply have moved on.

But again, for all I know, with the same information as the friend has, I may very well have come to the same judgment, though I would have behaved differently.

innerSpaceman · 11-02-2005, 08:46 AM

Ya know, I can't think of five things that people judge me about.

Oh, I can conceive of 5 items people might judge me about .... but since I have no evidence of any judgment going on, I'm not going to assume the nature of it.

I think that's mighty nice that the people in my life have at least the courtesy to keep any judgments of me to themselves. I would hope this does not extend to good friends foregoing constructive criticism, but it's generally pleasant that I do not feel subjected to judgment by anyone I know. How cool is that?

And it merely strengthens my feelings about judgmentalism itself. The absence of it feels good.

(And I know it would feel even better if I could stop doing it myself - - I consciously work on it ... with varying degrees of success. It does not require that I become unopinionated. Those who know me [whether they judge me or not] know that's never going to happen.)

MickeyLumbo · 11-02-2005, 08:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by innerSpaceman

How cool is that?

you so rock, ISM.

Crystal · 11-02-2005, 09:03 AM

For the record, I have not once said I do not judge other people. I think, to some extent, it is human nature to judge others. Now, I may judge others, BUT, unless their behavior is something that affects me directly, I keep my mouth shut and mind my own damn business. I may quietly lose a little bit of respect for the person I have judged, depending on what it is I am judging them for, I may even choose to no longer associate with them, but I would never personally attack another person.
Alex, my "friend" has judged me based solely on the fact that I am bisexual. She is entitled to her feelings. The problem I have is that, as a friend, she should have come to me and talked to me about how she felt, given me reason for her feelings and, if she decided that it is so against her beliefs, she could have, maturely, severed ties and ended the friendship. I would have respected that. However, she chose to call me on the phone and verbally attack me, being very offensive and for that I lost all respect for her.
It's over now, I will still grieve over the loss of the friendship, but I won't dwell on it. I have better things to do with my time.

Alex · 11-02-2005, 09:03 AM

There you go. MickeyLumbo just judged you. Or is judging only bad when it is negative judgement?

Alex · 11-02-2005, 09:07 AM

Crystal,

As I said, regardless of the validity of her judgment she was rude in the way she acted on it.

11-02-2005, 08:46 AM	#86
innerSpaceman Kink of Swank Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Inner Space Posts: 13,075	Ya know, I can't think of five things that people judge me about. Oh, I can conceive of 5 items people might judge me about .... but since I have no evidence of any judgment going on, I'm not going to assume the nature of it. I think that's mighty nice that the people in my life have at least the courtesy to keep any judgments of me to themselves. I would hope this does not extend to good friends foregoing constructive criticism, but it's generally pleasant that I do not feel subjected to judgment by anyone I know. How cool is that? And it merely strengthens my feelings about judgmentalism itself. The absence of it feels good. (And I know it would feel even better if I could stop doing it myself - - I consciously work on it ... with varying degrees of success. It does not require that I become unopinionated. Those who know me [whether they judge me or not] know that's never going to happen.)
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11-02-2005, 09:03 AM	#88
Crystal Member Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 98	For the record, I have not once said I do not judge other people. I think, to some extent, it is human nature to judge others. Now, I may judge others, BUT, unless their behavior is something that affects me directly, I keep my mouth shut and mind my own damn business. I may quietly lose a little bit of respect for the person I have judged, depending on what it is I am judging them for, I may even choose to no longer associate with them, but I would never personally attack another person. Alex, my "friend" has judged me based solely on the fact that I am bisexual. She is entitled to her feelings. The problem I have is that, as a friend, she should have come to me and talked to me about how she felt, given me reason for her feelings and, if she decided that it is so against her beliefs, she could have, maturely, severed ties and ended the friendship. I would have respected that. However, she chose to call me on the phone and verbally attack me, being very offensive and for that I lost all respect for her. It's over now, I will still grieve over the loss of the friendship, but I won't dwell on it. I have better things to do with my time.
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11-02-2005, 09:03 AM	#89
Alex . Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 13,354	There you go. MickeyLumbo just judged you. Or is judging only bad when it is negative judgement?
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11-02-2005, 09:07 AM	#90
Alex . Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 13,354	Crystal, As I said, regardless of the validity of her judgment she was rude in the way she acted on it.
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