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Old 11-03-2005, 04:44 PM   #1
innerSpaceman
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Fortunately, I've blocked it out so well that I can hardly remember why I hated it. But lemme see if I can recap a bit. Yeah, Anakin turning dark was bu!!sh!t, and his motivation for doing so was absurd, and the ease with which he turned was insulting and ludicrous. The dialogue between Anakin and Padme was even more stilted than in the last film, and they have ZERO chemistry together. There was scene after scene after scene for the first hour of the movie where the characters simply repeated stuff that the audience already knew. Snooze-bore-bad storytelling. When the action finally got going, it was truncated as well as ridiculous. The Order 66 segment of killing the Jedi was a nice montage helped loads by the J.Williams score (otherwise unimpressive this outting), but it was underplayed ... and of course all the Jedi who didn't have the good fortune to be Yoda died easier than I would. Bah. I really liked the battle in the Senate chamber between Palpatine and Yoda; it was visually interesting. Other than that though, I found visual interest in this film to be minimal (certainly nothing worth the psychedelic drugs I took -- a first for a Star Wars film). After the lame, video-game-unworthy opening spaceship battle, the action consisted of light saber duel followed by light saber duel followed by light saber duel before another light saber duel which preceded a 13th light saber duel. They made light saber duels boring. And the purportedly climactic fight between Obi-wan and Anakin was unbelievably retarded. I enjoyed the montage of Anakin being transformed into Darth Vader, but the laughable Frankenstein moment and "Noooooo!" bellow ruined the mood of the one good scene. Nothing much happening after that (other than the really lame birth of the twins and the somewhat cool-looking funeral for Padme) pounded home the conclusion that everything good happened either before the film (Clone Wars) or after the film (Darth Vader terrorizing the universe and hunting down the rest of the Jedi - - though, of course, not looking on Planet Obvious aka Tatooine). It's such poor filmmaking to have a movie of the most boring part of your story.

Let's see, did I leave anything out? I'm sure I have far more loathing for far more elements of this putrid piece of movie muck, but that's all that's coming to the top of my head.

And now, I must bathe.
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Old 11-03-2005, 04:56 PM   #2
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Yes, Episode III sucked. But after Attack of the Clones it almost felt like a relief in its relative goodness.

Bad dialog, bad motivations, bad plotting, bad special effects (special effects that were implemented impeccably but were pointless in their presence). Worst of all, a bad transition for what has to follow in the original three movies.

Here's hoping that George Lucas never again applies his eye to a camera. Let him stick to producing and making electrons move in computers.
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Old 11-03-2005, 05:01 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex Stroup
bad special effects (special effects that were implemented impeccably but were pointless in their presence).
So true. He seemed to have a mantra in his cinematography, "Okay, all you actors...hold perfectly still and talk forever. All the visual interest in this scene will be in the form of pointless crap moving around behind you." The concept of blocking completely escapes that man.

Quote:
Here's hoping that George Lucas never again applies his eye to a camera. Let him stick to producing and making electrons move in computers.
I'd be okay with him adding a few more story writing credits to his resume. Not script, story. He's pretty good at coming up at writing the basic kernel of some great stories, he just needs actual writers to take care of the little details like plot, dialog, continuity, etc.
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