Could you forgive someone who shot you?

[Nephythys]

Originally Posted by Alex Stroup

Depends on why I was shot.

She may have forgiven him but I'm guessing everybody would be pissed off if the judge did.

Forgiveness is not a free pass out of consequences.

[Alex]

Originally Posted by Nephythys

Forgiveness is not a free pass out of consequences.

Well, in my view forgiveness without a reduction in consequences is essentially meaningless. But I also doubt that the girl has reached any real decision on such and just knows that is what she is supposed to say. She is probably mirroring what adults around her have said or coached her to say.


GC: In that situation where the guy fired the gun without intention of hurting anybody but just in stupidity. Yes, I suppose I could forgive him. Though I'd still want him held responsible so I'm not sure what value such forgiveness would have.

[Gemini Cricket]

Originally Posted by Alex Stroup

Though I'd still want him held responsible so I'm not sure what value such forgiveness would have.

I was thinking the same thing about her possibly being coached. Although, I think it is good coaching if it is consistent with the way her parents actually think of the situation. Seeing the situation as forgivable is, to me, a way of moving on for the girl, the girl's family. I think the value is the ability to let go of a bad situation where the girl could blame this guy for the rest of her life and turn into a bitter adult.

[Alex]

Originally Posted by Gemini Cricket

I think the value is the ability to let go of a bad situation where the girl could blame this guy for the rest of her life and turn into a bitter adult.

Well, if forgiveness means that I won't allow my anger at someone to dominate my life to the detriment of all else then yes, I suppose I could forgive just about anything.

If forgiveness means I absolve you of responsbility/liability for your actions then it is a tougher hurdle.

[tracilicious]

Originally Posted by Alex Stroup

Well, in my view forgiveness without a reduction in consequences is essentially meaningless. But I also doubt that the girl has reached any real decision on such and just knows that is what she is supposed to say. She is probably mirroring what adults around her have said or coached her to say.

I agree. When she's old enough to fully realize how this will affect her forever, then she can come to a decision on forgiveness.

I could probably forgive just about anybody for just about anything. I would still expect the courts to do their job though.