Your tax dollars at rest

Ghoulish Delight · 09-21-2006, 11:34 AM

A government weapons research lab is bribing its employees with candy bars so that they'll use handrails on the stairs.

Strangler Lewis · 09-21-2006, 11:45 AM

Sounds like the set up for a new comic series about mutants.

CoasterMatt · 09-21-2006, 11:46 AM

Screw that noise, they didn't even get full size candy bars!

Ghoulish Delight · 09-21-2006, 11:46 AM

You'll note, by the way, that the lab is so proud of itself for this new policy that they issued a press release. I'd roll my eys again, but I've strained the muscles.

Alex · 09-21-2006, 12:00 PM

Eh, imagine how many birthday cakes and Christmas parties my tax money have helped fund over the years and this is inconsequential (if silly).

Of course, per the photo supplied it is probably the oldies who need the hand rail anyway that get the candy. I'm guessing this is a subtle campaign to kill off the employees who most strain the health insurance.

Capt Jack · 09-21-2006, 12:09 PM

Quote:

More than 400 pieces of candy were given to Lab employees who used the handrail properly.

so this is as opposed to what? sliding down the rail bare assed?

typical of la vida estúpido

Strangler Lewis · 09-21-2006, 12:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CoasterMatt

Screw that noise, they didn't even get full size candy bars!

Some genius probably determined that small candy bars are a sufficient incentive and that picking up the rest by offering full sized candy bars would lead to skyrocketing health and dental costs that would offset the worker's comp. savings.

katiesue · 09-21-2006, 12:31 PM

I'm sure there were many studies involved as well.

JWBear · 09-21-2006, 03:31 PM

Hey! No public sector employee bashing. We work hard!

€uroMeinke · 09-21-2006, 06:12 PM

Being stuck on a safety committee sucks all around. I mean, you'd think employees would have incentive enough not to do stupid things to get them killed or maimed, but alas it isn't true - thus it's up to the "Safety Committee" to come up with new and unusual ways to incent employees not to be stupid, so I find nothing appauling or unusual about this having seen many more absurd things come out of a safety committe.

09-21-2006, 11:34 AM	#1
Ghoulish Delight I Floop the Pig Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Alternative Swankstyle Posts: 19,348	Your tax dollars at rest A government weapons research lab is bribing its employees with candy bars so that they'll use handrails on the stairs. __________________ 'He who receives an idea from me, receives instruction himself without lessening mine; as he who lights his taper at mine, receives light without darkening me.' -TJ
	Submit to Quotes

09-21-2006, 11:45 AM	#2
Strangler Lewis Doing The Job Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: In a state Posts: 3,956	Sounds like the set up for a new comic series about mutants. __________________ Live now-pay later. Diner's Club!
	Submit to Quotes

09-21-2006, 11:46 AM	#3
CoasterMatt BRAAAAAAAINS! Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: One Step Beyond... Posts: 8,802	Screw that noise, they didn't even get full size candy bars! __________________ Do you like my photography? Visit photosbymatt.tumblr.com to purchase prints!
	Submit to Quotes

09-21-2006, 11:46 AM	#4
Ghoulish Delight I Floop the Pig Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Alternative Swankstyle Posts: 19,348	You'll note, by the way, that the lab is so proud of itself for this new policy that they issued a press release. I'd roll my eys again, but I've strained the muscles. __________________ 'He who receives an idea from me, receives instruction himself without lessening mine; as he who lights his taper at mine, receives light without darkening me.' -TJ
	Submit to Quotes

09-21-2006, 12:00 PM	#5
Alex . Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 13,354	Eh, imagine how many birthday cakes and Christmas parties my tax money have helped fund over the years and this is inconsequential (if silly). Of course, per the photo supplied it is probably the oldies who need the hand rail anyway that get the candy. I'm guessing this is a subtle campaign to kill off the employees who most strain the health insurance.
	Submit to Quotes

09-21-2006, 12:31 PM	#8
katiesue Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: San Diego Posts: 4,678	I'm sure there were many studies involved as well. __________________ My life is so exciting I can hardly stand it.
	Submit to Quotes

09-21-2006, 03:31 PM	#9
JWBear Worn Romantic Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Long Beach California Posts: 8,435	Hey! No public sector employee bashing. We work hard! __________________ Unrestrained frivolity will lead to the downfall of modern society.
	Submit to Quotes

09-21-2006, 06:12 PM	#10
€uroMeinke L'Hédoniste Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: A.S.C.O.T. Posts: 8,671	Being stuck on a safety committee sucks all around. I mean, you'd think employees would have incentive enough not to do stupid things to get them killed or maimed, but alas it isn't true - thus it's up to the "Safety Committee" to come up with new and unusual ways to incent employees not to be stupid, so I find nothing appauling or unusual about this having seen many more absurd things come out of a safety committe. __________________ I would believe only in a God that knows how to Dance. Friedrich Nietzsche
	Submit to Quotes