The curse of homemade gifts

[Cadaverous Pallor]

My mom likes to make stuff. When we don't tell her what to buy us for birthdays or anniversaries, she makes us things - horrible things.

Right now I have two such gifts in my closet. They're both in picture frames. One is sewn, the other involves colored sand, glitter, and those tiny fabric roses. One is burgundy and harvest gold, the other is neon green, pink, and royal blue.

It's sad, really, because I know she does these things out of pure love. I know it took her forever to make them. But they're truly ugly, awful things, and neither will ever be hung from my walls.

When she gave me the second one she said something like "you could hang it on the wall, or you could just put it in your closet, I know it might end up there." She laughed while she said it but I could tell she was really saying "It's ok that you hate it and you'll bury it away so no one can see it." I do my best to pretend I like the gifts but it's really, really hard.

I've had other awful gifts from my parents - bad DVDs, tacky items my mom got at the Salvation Army - and those I have no problem tossing. But can I throw out the homemade stuff? Am I cursed to keeping it in a box hidden away? Do I really have to move them to my swanky new digs?

[Gemini Cricket]

Just pull 'em out when they visit. Then back into the closet with them.

There's a 24" bronze dolphin (from Ralphie's dad) that gets that treatment.

[Disneyphile]

Originally Posted by Gemini Cricket

Just pull 'em out when they visit. Then back into the closet with them.

I highly recommend this as well.

I've received some um...... interesting stuff over the years, but mostly from friends. The "best" was this puffy fabric and lace covered "jewelry box" with my name in puffy fabirc paint written on the top. It was at that point that I just about seized my friend's glue gun for life. I know she tried her best, but man........ it was quite the monstrosity. So, it stayed in my dresser drawer to store stuff, and then I'd sit it out on top whenever she came over.

[CoasterMatt]

You could always pass it at the next white elephant gift exchange

[katiesue]

What if it's in the box that gets "lost" in the move?

[~MS~]

Originally Posted by katiesue

What if it's in the box that gets "lost" in the move?

Mine fell OFF the moving truck!

[Alex]

It took about 25 years to convince most of the people in my life that I honestly don't enjoy receiving gifts, but they finally caught on that it wasn't false modesty and now I don't have to deal with crappy handmade gifts or crappy store bought gifts.

[tracilicious]

Originally Posted by Alex Stroup

It took about 25 years to convince most of the people in my life that I honestly don't enjoy receiving gifts, but they finally caught on that it wasn't false modesty and now I don't have to deal with crappy handmade gifts or crappy store bought gifts.

Could you by any chance send every member of mine and Michael's family a letter that says, "Traci wants Barnes & Noble gift cards ONLY for the rest of her life until further notice."?

I really like homemade gifts provided that they are cool things like knit socks or chocolate or whatever. Our families are terrible at gifts. For one anniversary we got a talking plastic picture frame (thanks mom!), a stupid book of inspirational sayings about marriage that my sister picked up from the grocery store on her way to my house, and a whitman's sampler. I wanted to go and introduce myself to every member of my family as they clearly hadn't met me before.

My mother in law gives us the same gift every year. It consists of a basket (or a gift bag) of pastas and sauces that we probably won't eat, some sort of chocolate "delicacy," candy for Michael, and the latest Disney release. I give her a ton of credit because at least she puts thought and effort into her gift. If you are going to pick up a gift for me from a grocery store bookshelf on your way over because that also happens to be where you are buying soda, then please just skip it. I've got too much crap already.

I'm a little like Alex (a *little* ) in that I save almost nothing and I'm not very sentimental about objects. I throw away drawings and paintings Indi does all the time. As long as my mental facilities are intact I can rely on my memories of people if I want to reminisce. When my mind does go, trinkets won't be much use to me anyways. I do save a minimal amount of stuff though.

[LSPoorEeyorick]

Let me ask you this: would that ugly handmade gift give you a good memory or a laugh in fifty years after your mother has passed away, connecting you to who she was and how she loved you in her own, tasteless kind of way? If you think that, even then, it'll just be an ugly thing you held on to that doesn't help you remember her, then you might consider pitching it.

Or, as the others are cleverly advising, do the swap-out.

[JWBear]

Originally Posted by LSPoorEeyorick

Let me ask you this: would that ugly handmade gift give you a good memory or a laugh in fifty years after your mother has passed away, connecting you to who she was and how she loved you in her own, tasteless kind of way? If you think that, even then, it'll just be an ugly thing you held on to that doesn't help you remember her, then you might consider pitching it.

Or, as the others are cleverly advising, do the swap-out.

I say hold on to it. I received tons of kitschy crafty handmade gifts from my sister over the years. I go rid of most of it as soon as I got it. Now that she is dead, I treasure each and every piece that I still have. Most are stored out in the garage and I would never think of getting rid of them now. They are things made with her own hands that are now irreplaceable.

Anyway, that's my take on it.