Does that make it okay?

Ghoulish Delight · 11-02-2006, 09:46 AM

So our company allowed (and encouraged) a halloween celebration on Tuesday. It was kind of a big deal because it's the first time in like a decade, when, as a small company, they used to be a lot loser and less formal. Overall, it was a lot of fun, though filled with the usual lame office pleasantries that made me want to hurl.

But there was one costume...

So 10 years ago, one guy came dressed as a cheerleader. Haha. So this time, he came dressed as "the cheerleader 10 years later."

This costume was NOT appropriate for work. I mean, I don't care about corss dressing. I can deal with a man's hairy legs in white fishnets. But this costume had huge, exposed, saggy fake boobs hanging bellow a cutoff shirt. And the skirt was so short that I had the pleasure of an unobstructed vies of this guy's red panties trying desparately to crawl up his asshole.

NOT work appropriate.

But he got away with it. Not only did he get away with it, he was awarded a prize (for "Scariest Costume")!

It takes quite a bit to offend me, but damn. I was scratching me head as to how he was given a pass. I figured it must just be that he's been with the company so long, but it still seemed odd.

Then I heard a comment that raised an eyebrow. "That was an interesting costume. But with...the way he is...I guess he can get away with it." Hmmm.

My suspscion was confirmed later when someone else made the comment, "Well, I guess since he's gay it's okay."

What? WHAT?! Since when does being gay make it okay to wear inappropriate clothing to work, Halloween or not? I guarantee had any straight guy or any female worn that exact costume, they'd have been reprimanded before they got through the front door. But, oh, he's gay, so that's okay?

Sorry, but your sexual orientation doesn't change the appropriateness of having your panty-wedged ass hanging out.

Nephythys · 11-02-2006, 09:50 AM

No it doesn't- but it seems to make some people more afraid of offending them. Afraid that if they had said something he might have pulled that card and claimed to be harassed and singled out because he is gay.

Which he may not have done? Or maybe he has before?

Strangler Lewis · 11-02-2006, 10:09 AM

Doesn't every office need a self-appointed jester? Doesn't it have to be the gay guy? Isn't the alternative the receptionist in the rainbow afro?

I'm with Miss Manners that the personal and the professional bleed into each other too often. The responsible alternative, however, is the Sixties era office party where nobody dressed up but, if the movies are to be believed, people still went crazy. These, however, were fueled by staggering amounts of alcohol that allowed people to forget what had occurred the previous day, but that no liability conscious employer today would dare provide.

Ghoulish Delight · 11-02-2006, 10:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Strangler Lewis

but that no liability conscious employer today would dare provide.

Actually, we have a Christmas party every year (in a hotel banquet hall, not the office) with a hosted bar. Good times.

Nephythys · 11-02-2006, 10:22 AM

Open bar?

We used to have open bars- no more- now we get a couple of drink tickets. That's all folks!

Gemini Cricket · 11-02-2006, 10:22 AM

I think appropriateness is important in the workplace and whatever your sexual orientation you should stick to the rules. But, what were the rules? Were there any spelled out for everyone?

Also, keep in mind that the comments you heard were not his. He was not saying that he got away with it because he was gay, other people were saying that.

I'm also thinking that the costume was pretty clever and if you were there 10 years ago, it might have been funnier.

Nephythys · 11-02-2006, 10:26 AM

Off topic- can I move into your avatar GC- cause that looks divine!

Ghoulish Delight · 11-02-2006, 10:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemini Cricket

I think appropriateness is important in the workplace and whatever your sexual orientation you should stick to the rules. But, what were the rules? Were there any spelled out for everyone?

There were specific guidelines laid out for the costumes...but general "work appropriate" was assumed. And while the "work appropriate" line gets blurred when costumes are involved, this went well beyond the blur.

Quote:

Also, keep in mind that the comments you heard were not his. He was not saying that he got away with it because he was gay, other people were saying that.

No, he didn't say it, but he's not the one who decides whether he "gets away with it." It's his superiors. And I was baffled until I heard those comments and suddenly the general attitude I saw towards him by others who knew him better than I made sense and it became painfully obvious that it was only because he was openly gay that he was not reprimanded for wearing something well beyond the limits of appropriatemess.

Quote:

I'm also thinking that the costume was pretty clever and if you were there 10 years ago, it might have been funnier.

It was, but it could have been done more tactfully (did the sagging boobs HAVE to be completely bare, or could they have been under a shirt? Did his bare ass cheeks have to be exposed, or would a slightly longer skirt that kept him covered worked?). I'm all for funny, heck, I'm all for slightly inappropriate. But this crossed a line that no one else would have been allowed to even come close to and that kinda irked me.

Not to mention that several employees had their young children present.

Speaking of which, in a more light-hearted vein of outrage, I wanted to call shenanigans on one of the costume contest winners. Including a 2 month old baby dressed as a lobster (while mom was dressed as a chef with a large soup pot) in your costume should be banned. Illegal foreign substance. Like anyone stood a chance of winning against a feaking baby in a lobster costume! Cheater.

Stan4dSteph · 11-02-2006, 10:57 AM

Inappropriate and he should have been told to go home and change.

MouseWife · 11-02-2006, 11:15 AM

I think valid points have been said.

He didn't say he got away with it because he is gay. But, did they give him a free pass because he is? That is a bit offensive to me, if I were him. Hello, I'm gay, not mental. Gay doesn't mean without a conscience or values, etc. That I would find insulting.

It is funny, the idea of ten years later. But, I agree, it could have been done with more class. I've actually seen this costume, somewhere. The boobs should have been inside the shirt and the booty as well. I am sure the women were offended.

Ten years isn't acutually that long. I'd have to say about 50 years would bring the body to that state. Or more. Or some heavy partying.

11-02-2006, 09:46 AM	#1
Ghoulish Delight I Floop the Pig Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Alternative Swankstyle Posts: 19,348	Does that make it okay? So our company allowed (and encouraged) a halloween celebration on Tuesday. It was kind of a big deal because it's the first time in like a decade, when, as a small company, they used to be a lot loser and less formal. Overall, it was a lot of fun, though filled with the usual lame office pleasantries that made me want to hurl. But there was one costume... So 10 years ago, one guy came dressed as a cheerleader. Haha. So this time, he came dressed as "the cheerleader 10 years later." This costume was NOT appropriate for work. I mean, I don't care about corss dressing. I can deal with a man's hairy legs in white fishnets. But this costume had huge, exposed, saggy fake boobs hanging bellow a cutoff shirt. And the skirt was so short that I had the pleasure of an unobstructed vies of this guy's red panties trying desparately to crawl up his asshole. NOT work appropriate. But he got away with it. Not only did he get away with it, he was awarded a prize (for "Scariest Costume")! It takes quite a bit to offend me, but damn. I was scratching me head as to how he was given a pass. I figured it must just be that he's been with the company so long, but it still seemed odd. Then I heard a comment that raised an eyebrow. "That was an interesting costume. But with...the way he is...I guess he can get away with it." Hmmm. My suspscion was confirmed later when someone else made the comment, "Well, I guess since he's gay it's okay." What? WHAT?! Since when does being gay make it okay to wear inappropriate clothing to work, Halloween or not? I guarantee had any straight guy or any female worn that exact costume, they'd have been reprimanded before they got through the front door. But, oh, he's gay, so that's okay? Sorry, but your sexual orientation doesn't change the appropriateness of having your panty-wedged ass hanging out. __________________ 'He who receives an idea from me, receives instruction himself without lessening mine; as he who lights his taper at mine, receives light without darkening me.' -TJ
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11-02-2006, 09:50 AM	#2
Nephythys Yeah, that's about it- Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: In a state of constant crap to get done Posts: 2,688	No it doesn't- but it seems to make some people more afraid of offending them. Afraid that if they had said something he might have pulled that card and claimed to be harassed and singled out because he is gay. Which he may not have done? Or maybe he has before?
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11-02-2006, 10:09 AM	#3
Strangler Lewis Doing The Job Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: In a state Posts: 3,956	Doesn't every office need a self-appointed jester? Doesn't it have to be the gay guy? Isn't the alternative the receptionist in the rainbow afro? I'm with Miss Manners that the personal and the professional bleed into each other too often. The responsible alternative, however, is the Sixties era office party where nobody dressed up but, if the movies are to be believed, people still went crazy. These, however, were fueled by staggering amounts of alcohol that allowed people to forget what had occurred the previous day, but that no liability conscious employer today would dare provide. __________________ Live now-pay later. Diner's Club!
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11-02-2006, 10:22 AM	#5
Nephythys Yeah, that's about it- Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: In a state of constant crap to get done Posts: 2,688	Open bar? We used to have open bars- no more- now we get a couple of drink tickets. That's all folks!
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11-02-2006, 10:22 AM	#6
Gemini Cricket ... Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 13,244	I think appropriateness is important in the workplace and whatever your sexual orientation you should stick to the rules. But, what were the rules? Were there any spelled out for everyone? Also, keep in mind that the comments you heard were not his. He was not saying that he got away with it because he was gay, other people were saying that. I'm also thinking that the costume was pretty clever and if you were there 10 years ago, it might have been funnier.
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11-02-2006, 10:26 AM	#7
Nephythys Yeah, that's about it- Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: In a state of constant crap to get done Posts: 2,688	Off topic- can I move into your avatar GC- cause that looks divine!
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11-02-2006, 10:57 AM	#9
Stan4dSteph Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: East Bay Area, CA Posts: 3,156	Inappropriate and he should have been told to go home and change.
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11-02-2006, 11:15 AM	#10
MouseWife Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Da' Beach Posts: 2,957	I think valid points have been said. He didn't say he got away with it because he is gay. But, did they give him a free pass because he is? That is a bit offensive to me, if I were him. Hello, I'm gay, not mental. Gay doesn't mean without a conscience or values, etc. That I would find insulting. It is funny, the idea of ten years later. But, I agree, it could have been done with more class. I've actually seen this costume, somewhere. The boobs should have been inside the shirt and the booty as well. I am sure the women were offended. Ten years isn't acutually that long. I'd have to say about 50 years would bring the body to that state. Or more. Or some heavy partying. __________________ Summa' time....when the livins' easy.........
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