Advice request: How to do with stupid relatives?

SacTown Chronic · 02-23-2009, 11:10 AM

Maybe Leo's wife needs a spanking.

Betty · 02-23-2009, 11:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SacTown Chronic

Maybe Leo's wife needs a spanking.

I know I do...

Kevy Baby · 02-23-2009, 01:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Not Afraid

You are adults. You don't "get in trouble".

Try not paying your taxes and see what happens.

Jazzman · 02-23-2009, 03:44 PM

Lay out what the rules are (i.e. if you want us to attend, reasonable notice is required, if you want us to chip in on things, reasonable notice is also required, etc. etc.) then go on to do as everyone else says and ignore their crap. If you don't draw the line in the sand, and draw it so that it is very obvious, then they're going to continue to walk all over you guys, regardless of how you do or don't ignore their games. We had a somewhat similar, though not nearly as serious, issue with The Wife's brother and his ex concerning his kids, and we tried the high road, ignore-them-and-don't-cause-drama path, and it was just as disastrous but in other new and irritating ways. Only after we laid out what was acceptable and what was not, then stuck to it, did they get the message. Some feelings were bruised for a short time, but when we didn't budge, ever, they eventually accepted it and things are fine now. And don't leave your wife to handle it because it's "her family." Being married means you're in it together, always; which of course you know.

Like I said, though, things weren't as severe for us as they are apparently for you guys, but the principle is the same; you can only be the victim if you don't defend yourself.

02-23-2009, 11:10 AM	#1
SacTown Chronic the myth of the dream Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 2,217	Maybe Leo's wife needs a spanking. __________________ Is it the fingers, or the brain that you're teaching a lesson?
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02-23-2009, 03:44 PM	#4
Jazzman Sax God Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Portland's Tijuana Posts: 510	Lay out what the rules are (i.e. if you want us to attend, reasonable notice is required, if you want us to chip in on things, reasonable notice is also required, etc. etc.) then go on to do as everyone else says and ignore their crap. If you don't draw the line in the sand, and draw it so that it is very obvious, then they're going to continue to walk all over you guys, regardless of how you do or don't ignore their games. We had a somewhat similar, though not nearly as serious, issue with The Wife's brother and his ex concerning his kids, and we tried the high road, ignore-them-and-don't-cause-drama path, and it was just as disastrous but in other new and irritating ways. Only after we laid out what was acceptable and what was not, then stuck to it, did they get the message. Some feelings were bruised for a short time, but when we didn't budge, ever, they eventually accepted it and things are fine now. And don't leave your wife to handle it because it's "her family." Being married means you're in it together, always; which of course you know. Like I said, though, things weren't as severe for us as they are apparently for you guys, but the principle is the same; you can only be the victim if you don't defend yourself.
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